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Pastimes : CNBC Guys - The Hunks of Financial TV
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To: james h. snyder who wrote (4479)11/6/1998 4:11:00 PM
From: Redhead  Read Replies (1) of 5936
 
Just received an email from my aunt and uncle and they sent this...funny stuff...hope you all enjoy...

>
> WOMAN Chemical
>
> ELEMENT: Woman
>
> SYMBOL: WO
>
> DISCOVERER: MAN
>
> ATOMIC MASS: Accepted as 120 lbs but varies from
110 lbs to 260 lbs
>
> OCCURANCE: Copious quantities in all Urban Areas
>
> PHYSICAL PROPERTIES.
> 1: Surface usually covered with painted film.
> 2: Boils at various temperatures.
> 3: Freezes without any known reason.
> 4: Melts if given special treatment.
> 5: Bitter if incorrectly used.
> 6: Found in various states from Virgin Metal to
Common Ore.
> 7: Yields to pressure if applied to correct points.
>
> CHEMICAL PROPERTIES.
> 1: Has great affinity for Gold, Silver and a range
of precious
> stones.
> 2: Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
> 3: May explode spontaneously without prior warning
and for no apparent reason.
> 4: Insoluable in liquids, but activity greatly
increases by saturation in alcohol.
> 5: Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.
>
> COMMON USES.
> 1: Highly ornamental especially insports cars.
> 2: Can be a great aid in relaxation.
> 3: Very efficient cleaning agent
>
> TESTS.
> 1: Pure specimen turns rosy pink when found in its
natural state.
> 2: Turns green when placed next to a better
specimen.
>
> POTENTIAL HAZARDS.
> 1: Highly dangerous except in experienced hands
> 2: Dangerous to posses more than one, although
can be maintained
> at different locations as long as they do not
come into direct contact with each other.
>
>
>
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