Dan,
"I stand with the knowledge that He is able to make me stand"
Dan, to be MADE to stand is the way of a child, who would be good upon pain of punishment, and behaves because he is made to do so by a parent. A good parent teaches their child values, to that they may stand on their own. Jesus is a brother, not a God. And his purpose was to teach you values, such that you may stand on your own. This is part of spiritual maturity.
These are also different concepts between the Old Testament, with the Ten Commandments and fear of punishment, and the New, which teaches one how to behave because one desires to.
"You finally, in all of that, said that you believe in you. You hang your own self on your own cross and accept yourself and hidy ho off we go."
I'm sorry to hear that you do not believe in yourself, unless by this you mean that you do not believe in the part of yourself that is not of God.
14 "Guard the good deposit that was entrusted to you--guard it with the help of the Holy Spirit who lives in us."
It doesn't say that Spirit is newly arrived, does it? I simply see that it has always been there, and that I simply awakened to it.
Peace,
Darrin
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