Christine,
Some people are more selfish than others. Some see volunteering as a virtue, and others don't see the point. Whatever your daughter's nature, the adage "you can lead a horse to water..." applies. The best you can do with kids is to keep teaching them, gently, showing them the way that you think is best, but allowing them to take their own course, barring any physical danger. Even regarding physical danger, there is a need to balance short term and long term risk, i.e., over-strictness may cause rebellion, which may lead to more serious risks down the road. I was accused many times of laxness by family and friends, but I am more than satisfied with the lack of rebellion (of the dangerous sort) my kids demonstrate. My oldest is 20, and he is still developing. Our society has made 18 a magic number, but you need to think beyond that. I don't believe that our teaching comes to fruition for many years after. Be patient, above everything. Think back to those who were patient with you, and ask yourself if they are not the ones who had the greatest influence.
Skipper |
