Or, this scenario, one year later:
A forlorn creature known as PartyTime, beset by demons he could only incoherently and faintly whisper as "those damn ex-Simers", spends his time on rusting, decrepit freighter ships registered with the Iranian navy, saying over and over and over where are those "beautiful people from Newport, Rhode Island? They said they were going to meet me at Plymouth Rock, Massachusetts." Meanwhile, another creature, Patty Hayton, is seen with a tin cup begging at the entrance to New York subways, still wearing the matching pin stripe trousers and shirt from his last high security cell, uh . . . residence, and waiting to be adopted as a mascot by the fire station on 43rd St. in Manhattan. Jon Tara is trying to live down the humiliation and shame from being the first and last person with a lifetime ban from Silicon Investor by unanimous vote of all subscribers, who threatened to abandon SI en masse if he was allowed to post one more time. Bambaata has become a full-time quality assurance person for the legal profession, at the rate of $6.00 per hour, to ensure that its members spend their time prudently and do not use the internet during normal working hours. Keith Montgomery, the purported, but missing President of Zulu, for all of 1998, was finally tracked down by 125 FBI agents and an all-persons bulletin board as in fact only a harmless chimpanzee at the Los Angeles Zoo, to which some anonymous donor with the initials P.H. had allegedly donated $500 on the condition the animal be named Keith Montgomery. His sidekick in his zoo cage was also named, at the insistence of the same mystery person P.H., Paul Messina. AJ and Zuluteki were re-married in Las Vegas, where they risked and lost the present market value of their entire Zulu holdings (about $3.00 and loose change) on number 13 at the new MGM Grand roulette table. Brady was last seen opening the largest lizard ranch in the world, and using stacks of Zulu stock certificates as post-its for his office. Aleta and Homer and family were last seen sailing the world in a 200 foot yacht, with Aleta purportedly having made a seven figure fortune in day trading just one stock, Zulu, for a period of 18 months. A small child known as "Iamnotpayhayton" settled his securities claims against certain unknown companies, their officers, and their controlling shareholder, and celebrated by having a non-alcoholic party specially catered by PartyTime and a cast of rollerblading assistants before his departure on his sinking freighter. |
