To All, A man arrives at The Pearly Gates. St. Peter asked how he died.
"I came home to my high rise condo and found my wife trying to dress in a hurry. I knew she'd been fooling around. So, I searched under the bed, in the closets, in the bathtub and every other place I could think of, but I couldn't find her lover. Then I looked at the balcony and saw a man hanging on by his fingertips. I ran out to the balcony and stomped on his fingers. But he hit a phone line, which broke his fall, and then landed in a tree. He was hurt, but still alive. Enraged, I grabbed the refrigerator, threw it over the balcony, and it squashed the SOB. The stress of the effort caused me to have a coronary and here I am."
"Well, my son, it was a crime of passion, so welcome to Heaven."
The next man in line stepped forward and Pete asked how he had died.
"I was out on my balcony doing calisthenics and I guess I got carried away. I pushed myself too hard and fell over the balcony. But I was able to grab hold of the balcony below mine. I was starting to pull myself up when a crazy man stomped on my fingers. A phone line and a tree broke my fall, though I was really hurting. Then, out of nowhere, this refrigerator landed on me."
St. Pete laughed and said, "you are welcome to Heaven, my son."
The next man in line was Bill Clinton.
"Mr. President, how did you die?"
"As hard as it is to believe, I was minding my own business, relaxing inside this refrigerator." <G>
MB |
