"President Clinton's Testimony" by Dr. Suess
I did not do it in a car, I did not do it at a bar
I did not do it in the dark, I did not do it in the park
I did not do it on a date, I did not ever fornicate
I did not do it at a dance, I did not do it in her pants
I did not get beyond first base, I did not do it in her face
I never did it in a bed, If you think that you've been misled
I did not do it with a groan, I did not do it on the phone
I did not cause her dress to stain
I never boinked Saddam Hussein
I did not do it with a whip, I never fondled Linda Tripp
I never acted really silly, with volunteers like Kathleen Willey
There was one time with Margaret Thatcher
I chased her 'round but couldn't catch her
No kinky stuff, not on your life, I wouldn't even with my wife
And Gennifer Flowers' tale of woes
was paid for by my right-wing foes
And Paula Jones, and those State Troopers
Are just a bunch of party poopers
I did not ask my friends to lie, I did not hang them out to dry
I did not do it last November, but if I did I don't remember
I did not do it in the hall, I could have but I don't recall
I never did it in the study, I never did it with my dog Buddy
I never did it with Sox, the cat, I may have once with Arafat
I never did it in a hurry, I never groped Ms. Betty Currie
there was no sex at Arlington there was no sex on Air Force One
I might have copped a little feel, and then attempted to conceal
I never did those things so lewd, at least not ever in the nude
These things to which I have confessed
do not count if we stayed dressed
It never happened with a cigar, I never dated Mrs. Starr
I did not know this little sin, would be retold on CNN
I broke some rules that mama taught me,
I tried to hide but now you'vre caught me
But I implore I do beseech
Do not condemn Do not impeach
to stop the vote I bombed Iraq, to get the monkey off my back
when all I needed was one more day
for Speaker Livingston to come out and say
That he was involved in something ruder
" I confess I am the second shooter" |
