Wouldn't it be great if someone -- anyone -- taped their conversations with God. In most states (e.g. Hawaii), I believe, it is perfectly legal to tape both sides of a conversation even though only one party knows about of the taping. God couldn't sue for a restraining order to prevent its publication, and we could all learn if James Earl Jones is really God and not just his mouthpiece.
Frank Ramsay, a died-young Cambridge mathematician (and brother of a late Archbishop of Canterbury) wrote about 1926 that all conversation reduces to two propositions: "I went to Grantchester today" and "I like kidney pie." Because of the limited scope of response allowed in these algorithms ("I didn't" and "I don't") there's little opportunity for resolution or disjunction of disagreements, and conversation reduces to an empty vanity (thus Ramsay effectively predicted the Internet). Ramsey could have been mistaken, or mistook. It is conceivable that a conversation with God, if properly directed, could be extraordinarily useful. Some scenarios:
Q.(young astrophysicist) "Is there sufficient hidden matter in the universe to cause recontractation?"
A. (God) No. Take my word for it, you can stop looking. Average density is going to zero."
***
Q.(virologist) "When will we find a cure for AIDs?"
A. (God) "Won't. Use condoms or stop buggering each other."
***
Q.(philosopher) "How can I reach peace with the Universe?"
A. (God) "Die."
**
Q. (worrier) "Will there be life after my death."
A. (God) "Yep. Other people will continue to live."
**
Q. (physicist) "Has it been known for any proton to decay since the beginning of time?"
A. (God) "No." <snap> "Correction -- just one."
**
Q. (theologian) "Was Jesus Christ your Son?"
A. (Holy spirit, wagging his flipper) "I did not have sexual relations with that woman -- Mary Jacobson." |
