<<The norm is to be rational, but most, when children, are
programmed to become irrational. I am not talking about
imagination or dreams, but irrational thought that
persistently ignores reality in favor of fantasy or wishful
thinking.>>
I like to believe that, and if I confused what I wished with what was the case, as is so commonly done, I would. But when I read your words I think of how differently other cultures -- everyone in them -- interpret the word 'rational,' and define the word 'fantasy.'
I had two secretaries once who fought over whether one had cast a spell over the other. The evidence was a container of milk someone had left on the 'victim's' desk. It wasn't poisoned or anything. It was just there. They had always been friends. No one in the office except the Americans (this was in Africa) thought this was irrational. Later, a clerk in this same office was instructed by me to make a series of telephone calls. She didn't do it, and a couple of hours later, when her negligence had created problems, simply declared to me that I had not told her to make any calls. The list was still on her desk. There was no higher authority that she could have been attempting to convince. I was her boss. It was clear to me that she was behaving irrationally. It was clear to her that she was behaving rationally. I still don't understand these things. Another employee, a key person without whom the office couldn't function unless we arranged in advance for a substitute to carry out her duties, decided not to return to work for several days after a holiday, and chose not to inform the office. This was not the first time this sort of thing had happened. She had been warned repeatedly. So I fired her, as I had told her I would do the next time she did this.
I can tell you she was genuinely indignant. Furious. Using personal contacts in high places, she went to a government official and complained. To my amazement, the only reason I won the argument was that she hadn't asked her husband's advice about whether she should come in to work or not. She was behaving irrationally to me; but not to most who knew of the situation.
Any time members of one culture find themselves submerged in another, they lose their firm grip on the concept, "fantasy vs reality."
Closer to home, speaking of fantasy vs reality: There was a time when I was supporting our family alone while my husband worked on a particular project. This was a period of several years. During that time, I applied for a credit card. It was necessary for me to get my unemployed, dependent husband's signed permission to get this card. This was in the United States, and not so very long ago, either. |
