(KBSNews ) KBS: DCI Contemplates Offer for IXC Communications
WASHINGTON, DC -- DCI Communications Inc., an emerging voice, data and Internet carrier, said it has decided to go for broke, literally, and contemplate acquiring IXC Communications of Austin, TX. The start-up calling card-cum-long distance carrier also may look into investing in a smelling salts consortium in order to have ample supplies available in the event any of its shareholders actually believe this post.
Bill France, retired military officer and habitual rabble rouser, commented on the possibility, "What the hell is wrong with this stock price?!"
Brad Grupo chimed in, "I did not and you know it!!!!!!!" after which he was the target of consoling remarks from Bruce, Ed, Peppe Le Pew and Elvis.
Ken Salaets was unavailable for comment, due to previous commitments castigating young punks on another thread for their nonchalance re the Y2K problem, and Wisdom Kilometers issued his/her usual "Don't worry, be happy, buy one million shares" no comment.
The company has indicated through emissaries that it is promising the IRS a windfall by no later than March 15, after which landing boats will be descending en mass on Cleveland, Ohio, for a short jaunt to Dayton.
This release is forward looking, clearly a farce, and posted for the helluvit to remind people that this is the DCI thread, not the IXC thread, and while it is comforting to focus on the good fortunes of others while we hope and pray to some day (this century, hope hope!) have our own celebration, let's stick to the fun-da menthols and have a nice weekend.
5 Feb 1999 1353
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