I have a theory that's been floating around in my mind ever since I joined this thread. It may be shocking to you all, so brace yourselves . . .
Lucretius Taurus is secretly long Dell in a very big way.
Now this may seem like a heretical view. Certainly, it's a dangerous one--why, if one of Mr. Taurus' friends were to read this, he would be immediately ostracized, cast out of the Bear's den and into the harsh light of optimism and aggressive earnings growth. "But wait," I hear you ask, "do Bears have friends?" Ah yes, my good threadsters, they most certainly do, though they are commonly referred to as 'cronies.'
What proof may I offer that may lend credence to this striking revelation? First and foremost, why would Lucretius bother to visit this fair thread on such a regular and predictable basis? Perhaps I should turn the question around to lend it the proper perspective: When was last time one of us went over to the Dell Bear Thread to heckle the posters after a big run-up in the stock's price? What, you do not participate in such joyless sport? You find no pleasure in torturing the cynical? Ah, my friends, I know none of us have been there for there have been exactly 27 posts to that thread this year. By the time I finish writing this, there will be more posted here than all the Bears combined.
Ah, I see your heads nodding as it all becomes clear. Lucretius is here for information, for the kind of information not readily given an outsider . . . What better way to plumb the depths of this thread's cognoscenti than to raise their hackles, to invoke emotional responses?
Oh, I grant you it is quite a plan. But the most insidious part of this scheme, the master stroke of genius is that he also gets on the Bear thread . . . and pretends to be long. You see the genius of this. Our Lucretius, as apparently devout a Dell-Disparagion a person could be, goes out and chastises the misinformed Bears for their short-sighted selling. And thus he gets the best information from both sides of the fence.
I will no longer spend sleepless nights worrying that Lucretius is losing his hard-earned savings while Dell rises inexorably into the future, for now I am sure that he has more shares than I can possibly imagine . . . |
