OT (A Real blonde Story - )
Supposedly an actual news release:
>
> WANTED FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER (The actual AP headline)
>
> Linda Burnett, 23, was visiting her inlaws, and
> while there went to a nearby supermarket to pick up
> some groceries.
>
> Several people noticed her sitting in her car with the
> windows rolled up and with her eyes closed, with
> both hands behind the back of her head.
>
> One customer who had been at the store for a while
> became concerned and walked over to the car. He noticed
> that Linda's eyes were now open, and she looked very
> strange. He asked her if she was okay, and Linda replied that
> she'd been shot in the back of the head, and had been holding
> her brains in for over an hour.
>
> The man called the paramedics, who broke into the car because
> the doors were locked and Linda refused to remove her hands
> from her head. When they finally got in, they found that Linda
> had a wad of bread dough on the back of her head. A Pillsbury
> biscuit canister had exploded from the heat, making a loud
> noise that sounded like a gunshot, and the wad of dough hit her
> in the back of her head.
>
> When she reached back to find out what it was, she felt the
> dough and thought it was her brains.
>
> She initially passed out, but quickly recovered and tried to hold
> her brains in for over an hour until someone noticed and
> came to her aid.
>
> And, yes, Linda is a blonde.
>
>
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