Anybody made their 2000 plans? Oh boy. There's a turdle I can't wait to have
behind me.
When I was 7 or so, I tried to figure out, in my chartreuse and purple
bedoom room, if I would be alive in the year 2000. I think I was unsure
about subtraction; you know, 1959 from 2000. But then you have to add the
six years I'd already been alive ~ that's going to be too complex to get
reliable data. I think it might have been the first computation I ever tried to
work out in my head, and there's nothing to hold the numbers still in your head.
When you move to the next one, and get it right, get the right one, the other has disappeared.
Okay. But don't let go of this one when you go back after the other one.
See; I'm not as dumb as you think. It just doesn't work.
Whatever I came up with, getting number and number (and for some
reason 44 rings a bell and was only a few years off) ~ I thought it was a long
way away. I would have to stretch it pretty thin to get there.
I was even thinking of making a plan for how to do that. I'm pretty sure I did;
because I remember it. It gave me my first serious, non-toy goal in life.
Like: don't get killed in a car crash. Avoid car crashes. I think that was
about it. I discovered you can't be sure about how you're going to die.
There's nothing to hold it still in your head.
I wanted to be around, so I Could Be Part Of The Really Special Party. They
would have to have one. A New Year's Eve Party, but bigger than the
ones we have now, "regularly." What would it be? Well, I don't know; but it
would be bigger. Much, bigger. (No natural-born party-planner here.) It
would have to be things I hadn't seen before, and that's why I wanted to see it.
(Neophilia had already set in.)
And I wanted to see how happy people will be. They would have to be
happy-er. Happy-er. (er is the same as more.) Smiling and party happy;
but smiling their Super Big Smile. The Super Big Year 2000 one.
One I haven't seen yet; not the same as their regular happy smiles. (Somehow I think this relates to drug neediness.) (Oh shut up.) (Oh come on. When you're set up for failure that creates emotional emptiness, you're halfway to the liquor cabinet.) (You're stupid.) (You have unrealistic promises about life ~ ) (SHUT UP!)
Lost my place for a second. Wait.....wait....
See how disruptive those smarty pants know-it-all personalities are?
Shoot. Okay. That might have been all I have to say. But that's impossible.
Oh. I got caught in the Crawford's lot once. I was stretching my little
lacewings, and they got ripped off and wrapped around my legs like calf rope.
But that's another story, and we're already crammed with content here.
And I got caught in a lady's avocado tree. |
