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Pastimes : Let's Talk About Our Feelings!!!
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To: E who wrote (32196)3/7/1999 10:40:00 PM
From: Dayuhan  Read Replies (1) of 108807
 
From a male viewpoint, I can say that a major factor preventing philandering is a general assumption that most available women are not simply out for an exclusively sexual fling, and that those few that are pose excessive health risks. Being caught in the middle makes scenes almost inevitable. Men, as Oscar Wilde once observed, hate scenes, and the desire to avoid the possibility of major scenes where one is indisputably wrong is often greater than the desire for immediate sexual gratification. There is usually a quick calculation, which ends with the conclusion that dalliance would risk more than it would gain.

If you really like the person the equation usually changes, but this doesn't happen that often. Most men I know inevitably find that the women they really admire are unavailable or uninterested; this is as true of married men as it is for single ones, and is presumably related to the human tendency to want whatever you can't have.
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