*OT* a little New Zealand news which made our local paper. Jon Carroll is a pretty funny guy IMHO...
Shoes for Industry, Shoes for Defense
JON CARROLL
Tuesday, March 16, 1999
©1999 San Francisco Chronicle
URL: sfgate.com
JACQUES LE BLANC, the French ambassador to New Zealand, gave a candid
interview to a newspaper in Wellington when he left his job. Women in New Zealand,
he complained, wore ''enormous shoes.''
The ambassador's obsession with shoes was apparently not known until the
interview, although Helen Clark, the leader of the Labor Party, shot back that Le
Blanc was ''only interested in short skirts.''
Apparently, Le Blanc is not a member of that elite group of fetishists who admire
women with short skirts and enormous shoes, although Thighs and Clogs magazine
sells as well in France as it does in Canada, where the movement is headquartered.
Antonio Provenzano, the Italian envoy to New Zealand, entered the fray at this point,
defending his colleague on the grounds that feet are ''humble things'' and need all the
ornamental help they can get. The Italians, like the French, apparently believe that
enormous shoes are not ornamental, despite the existence of the Milan- based
publication Honking Great Booters, which serves primarily the Swiss population of
that populous industrial city.
Some of this is true, by the way.
In any event (and here we get to the crux), Provenzano explained his position thusly:
''With a choice between being 100 percent comfortable but despised by other
people and 100 percent uncomfortable but admired, the average European would
choose the latter.''
It is, I think, a statement suitable for being stitched into a sampler and framed. It
explains so much that was hitherto not explained, including both world wars, most
Romantic poetry and all movies by Ingmar Bergman.
And, of course, Italian shoes.
IT SEEMS TO me, as the founding editor of Off Each Other's Backs magazine, that
the essential validity of the feminist movement can be demonstrated by an examination
of footwear around the world.
There is an old saying that Ginger Rogers was a superior dancer to Fred Astaire
because she did everything he did except backward and while wearing high heels.
Although amusing, this saying was created by someone who never actually saw Fred
and Ginger movies because (a) he moved backward as much as she did, (b) she
didn't do everything he did and (c) even when she did them, she didn't do them as
well.
But the ''high heels'' part is true. A viewing of the new movie ''Tango'' reveals a
similar disparity; while the men indeed do have raised heels (and pointy little shoes
that must be hell on their toes), the women have higher heels with less surface area,
even pointier toes, plus short dresses to display the taut musculature created by the
high heels.
The men in ''Tango'' do not wear shorts, even though they too may very well have
taut musculature. That is perhaps the point -- the women in ''Tango'' do everything
the men do while displaying their legs. Let the men do that without looking silly; then
we'll talk.
WE LIVE IN a more enlightened bioregion. We are almost like New Zealand,
except we actually have an ozone layer. Women may wear comfortable shoes to
work, unless they seek rapid promotion.
That was why we have that odd female commuter fashion statement, the running
shoe-with-business suit combination, accessorized with the bulging briefcase carrying
the pointy little shoes with the elevated heels.
Glance at the footwear of the women who have broken the glass ceiling, the senators
and CEOs and corporate attorneys. Glance at the footwear of their male
counterparts. Which group will have fewer foot problems? Ask yourself: Why is
being on a first-name basis with your podiatrist a key to success for women?
Women, like men, may wish voluntarily to wear uncomfortable clothing. Fashion is a
wonderful mystery. It's the implied compulsion that's the issue here. No wonder M.
Le Blanc hates enormous shoes; he fears the rebellion they imply.
Booted women poised to strike, or merely to change in the bathroom
I love your belt, the way it hangs so low, so low upon your jrc@sfgate.com.
©1999 San Francisco Chronicle Page E10 |
