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Pastimes : Jokes

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To: richard surckla who wrote (1834)3/26/1999 11:58:00 PM
From: Barney  Read Replies (2) of 2733
 
One day St. Peter was sitting at the steps of the gates to heaven, fiddiling with his fingers, then suddenly he hears "excuse me sir, i recollect your supposed to let me in heaven."

St. Peter looks up and he sees Forrest Gump. So he stands up tall and starts by saying, "in order for me to let you in, i must ask you 3 questions." Forrest says, okay hit me." St. Peter asks," How many seconds are in a year?" It takes Forrest some time to answer and then he comes up with,"Okay, im ready now." St. Peter says well give me your answer." Forrest says,"there are 12 seconds in a year." St. Peter asks,"Well how did you come up with that answer?" Forrest replies,"Well sir, see i took my time on this one and i thought about it over and over in my head and i thought, hey, Jan. 2, feb. 2, mar. 2..."

St. Peter says, "Well that answers pretty good so i'll give you the next one. How many days of the week start with the letter 'T'?" Forrest replies, "Hhuumm....okay sir my answer is today and tomorrow" Well St. Peter doesn't want to know were that answer came from so he lets it swing by.

St. Peter asks the third question, "Whats God's first name?" Forrest was thinking on this one really hard, so he asks "Can I go back to earth and think about this one?" St. Peter says okay you got 2 days." so Forrest went to earth and then came back 2 days later and he came back running and screaming, " I got it, I got it," all out of breath he says to St. Peter, " It's Howard."

St. Peter looks puzzled and asks, "How did you get that?" Forrest says, " I found it in the Bible, it read: Our father, who art in heaven, HOWARD be thy name."
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