<Bang Bang> All rise, the Honourable Judge Raymond Oliver Thurston Fitzgerald presiding…
Counsel Lawrence O'Leary: So, you say you have evidence in your briefcase?
Mikey Slyver: Uh…yes, it's right there, under the ham sandwich (darn, I hope they left off the mustard—gives me gas).
Counsel LOL: And we should just accept this into court? Perhaps you have some additional evidence in your suit jacket?
MS: Not today. It's in the green one, upper left-hand pocket. (Darn, I hope Benita didn't take that one to the cleaners today.)
Judge ROTF: I'm sorry, but this court can't accept evidence that's laying around half the city. It's either here, or it isn't.
MS: Well, you see, I usually wear the green one on Wednesdays, but…
ROTF: I don't care about that. I want to get on with this case!
LOL: Well, Mr. Slyver, let's stick with what we know. This certificate, number 2142, is listed to JB Oxford, is it not?
MS: Yeah, but it's a forgery, and besides, they conspired with Zapperino, and Mandy Anne to steal it. So—it's a stolen forgery. Case closed.
ROTF: If you don't mind, I'd like to decide when this case is concluded.
LOL: So, you contend that this certificate was issued without your approval?
MS: Nobody saw me do it, and they couldn't prove it even if they did.
LOL: Move to strike, Your Honour. The 'Bart Simpson' defense has no bearing on this case.
ROTF: Granted. |
