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Pastimes : The Naked Truth - Big Kahuna a Myth

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To: accountclosed who wrote (33310)4/14/1999 6:45:00 AM
From: eddie r gammon  Read Replies (1) of 86076
 
I found this today. I think it fits very well in todays market (g)
=================================================================
> Cynic's Guide to Hi-Tech
> -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
>
> - NEW - Different color from previous design
>
> - ALL NEW - Parts and accessories not interchangable with previous
> design
>
> - EXCLUSIVE - Imported product
>
> - UNMATCHED - Almost as good as the competition
>
> - DESIGNED SIMPLICITY - Manufacturer's cost cut to the bone
>
> - FOOLPROOF OPERATION - No provision for adjustments
>
> - ADVANCED DESIGN - The advertising agency doesn't understand it
>
> - IT'S HERE AT LAST! - Rush job; Nobody knew it was coming
>
> - FIELD-TESTED - Manufacturer lacks test equipment
>
> - HIGH ACCURACY - Unit on which all parts fit
>
> - DIRECT SALES ONLY - Factory had big argument with distributor
>
> - YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT - We finally got one that works
>
> - REVOLUTIONARY - It's different from our competitiors'
>
> - BREAKTHROUGH - We finally figured out a way to sell it
>
> - FUTURISTIC - No other reason why it looks the way it does
>
> - DISTINCTIVE - A different shape and color than the others
>
> - MAINTENANCE-FREE - Impossible to fix
>
> - RE-DESIGNED - Previous faults corrected, we hope...
>
> - HAND-CRAFTED - Assembly machines operated without gloves
>
> - PERFORMANCE PROVEN - Will operate through the warranty period
>
> - MEETS ALL STANDARDS - Ours, not yours
>
> - ALL SOLID-STATE - Heavy as Hell!
>
> - BROADCAST QUALITY - Gives a picture and produces noise
>
> - HIGH RELIABILITY - We made it work long enough to ship it
>
> - SMPTE BUS COMPATABILE - When completed, will be shipped by
> Greyhound
>
> - NEW GENERATION - Old design failed, maybe this one will
> work
>
> - MIL-SPEC COMPONENTS - We got a good deal at a government auction
>
> - CUSTOMER SERVICE ACROSS THE COUNTRY - You can reach us from most
> airports
>
> - UNPRECEDENTED PERFORMANCE - Nothing we ever had before
> worked THIS way
>
> - BUILT TO PRECISION TOLERANCES - We finally got it to fit together
>
> - SATISFACTION GUARANTEED - Manufacturer's, upon cashing
> your check
>
> - MICROPROCESSOR CONTROLLED - Does things we can't explain
>
> - LATEST AREOSPACE TECHNOLOGY - One of our techs was laid off by
> sBoeing
>=================================================================

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