It is obvious that there are many kinds of rape. E-model rape is fully sexual with sexual organs as the means and the end. Many others D-type -- domination rape uses sexual organs as the instrument or means but domination as the end. I'd like to introduce another kind, of which I have perhaps been guilty -- N-type rape. The man, pursuing sexual objectives, is aggressive and ignores signals and even words denying his pursuit. Sometimes the woman resists physically, but in a way the man can convince himself is playful not serious. And then denying, she consents, she participates, she expresses her love and great satisfaction in the best way she can. The couple fall in love, despite the one way intention at the start. At first, denying, she changes her mind. The man -- a rapist -- because he does not have her consent to sex, is guilty of a crime. The woman, forgiving him, can crush him with guilt whenever she needs to. The man, pardoned by her late consent, denies to himself that he raped her.
"Good" girls are taught that they must not consent to sex before marriage, and then that they must submit to her husband's lust. Many girls burn with sexual desire, cannot ask for sex, and are content to be seduced without their consent. They feel terrible (honestly) about their seduction.
The "good" boy is taught that he must not engage in any sex of any kind. He masturbates in secret or with other boys. He feels guilty. He is attracted to a pretty girl, but is often too shy to ask her out and try out sexual moves on her. He kisses her and if she really is a "good" sexless girl she sits there motionless, lips closed, and he knows she disapproves of him. Or if she's "bad" she opens her lips and he knows not what to do. They fumble with each other. Two babes in arms. If he is "successful", he may be guilty of rape (in some states). She is too young to consent. But if she had not egged him on (they both think) nothing would have happened except an embarrassing silence. This is teen-age rape a very common kind I think.
Ordinary men, many of them, commit T-type and N-type rape. Most escape punishment, even in their minds. Some are proud of their "triumphs." Others feel guilty even if they wed the girls they have raped. Others are surprised in their old age when they are accused of earlier rape by their long-time wives. Few are innocent.
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