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Pastimes : Don't Ask Rambi

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To: Ilaine who wrote (23761)	4/29/1999 7:40:00 PM
From: Gauguin	Read Replies (7) of 71178

I realize now I should have said I was gone. That would have been better. (I wish I were.) It isn't the truth, but it is. I have to go. I have to talk to some people. I don't like that. But I will feel better if I finish it. For some reason I want you guys to know I didn't use to have these storms. It's important to me. That is. I got here from someplace better. A place satisfied and disciplined. I would be happy to get those balances again. People would say, well, you're doing better. I would say, no, "I'm being where I was. I haven't grown anything." I knew I was fine. I'd worked hard to get there. It lasted a fair long time, but it was the top. Gotta work like x times harder to get it back. It's not fun doing it over, but shit. No other way. Drugs would be nice.

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