What's next is Arava (leflunomide), a DMARD (disease-modifying-or-altering-drug) (don't you love the acronym? Sounds so, so, I don't know what). Just took the first pill, did not go into anaphylactic shock, which is not common, but you never know. Now I take one every day, and wait and see what, if anything, happens. DMARDS are slow, this may take two weeks or three months before we know. If it works for me, I may be able to get off the prednisone, which really does help, don't get me wrong. Prednisone is an anti-inflammatory, mimics the cortisol your own adrenal glands put out, but has some unfortunate side effects, e.g., the psychiatric ones Gaugie mentioned, the bones ones he mentioned, weight gain, puffiness or moon face, edema, hormonal disregulation, and it's catabolic, tears down muscles, which is the opposite of anabolic, like the body builders take. However, if you ever need it, don't let the side effects stop you. It saved Gaugie's life, literally, and it's saving my cartilage. So we make our deal with the devil, and hope to come out ahead in the long run.
I just want to be "normal."
You are so right about the chemical soup. Once you become aware of your own reactions, you can to a certain extent control it, but you are always going to be a slave to that soup. Just tell yourself it's all Maya (illusion), see if that helps. Sometimes it helps me. Not when I am stuck on the Beltway. The radio helps more. |
