Some examples of "You can't [whatever] your way out of a paper bag."
A quick net search turned up gazillions of examples demonstrating the widespread use of this well-known (except to you) expression. Here are a few, some of which are actually rather amusing (emphasis mine):
Keanu Reeves Found Dead
Actor Suffocated In Paper Bag
Mon., 15 June 1998 17:25:11 GMT
Story from SBN / M. E. Terrell
Copyright 1998 by SuBBrilliant News
HOLLYWOOD, 15-JUN-1998 (SBN) - Semi-known actor Keanu Reeves was found dead yesterday morning from asphyxiation. Reeves apparently failed an attempt to win a bet by acting his way out of a paper sack.
"I knew he couldn't do it," said Emmett Mackel, who had made the original wager. "'Keanu couldn't act his way out of a paper bag,' I told my friend Jim, but Jim was like, 'Naw, he's good, man,' but I'm like 'No way,' and stuff, and then Jim says, 'You wanna put your money where your mouth is?'"
The wager resulted in the ultimate demise of the young actor, who had his whole life ahead of him. Keanu was known for his skill at playing an expressionless rock that speaks in stiff, stilted dialogue.......
subbrilliant.com
Schrodinger's Rules of Critiquing
1) Critique the writing, never the writer. Never say, "You are..." or "You should..." Instead say, "The writing is..." or "The story should..."
2) Find what is right in each piece as well as what is wrong.
3) Don't say, "This is how I would write it;" how you would write it isn't the point.
4) Remember that subject matter is personal. You don't have to like a story to give it a fair critique.
5) Remember what your biases are and critique around them.
6) Remember that real people wrote this stuff, and real people have real feelings.
Things you may not say while critiquing.
"That's awful."
"That's stupid."
"You couldn't write your way out of a paper bag."
pionet.net
Steve Jackson Games Writers' Guidelines: Libel and Obscenity
The general philosophy at SJ Games is that, if you have to use obscenity or direct insult in order to get the reader's attention, you probably can't write your way out of a paper bag, and we don't want to know you.
sjgames.com
From The Yorksite Full-Deckism Compendium:
316.Couldn't hit water if he fell out of a boat.
317.Couldn't organize a piss-up in a brewery. (Common in Australia.)
318.Couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions on the heel.
319.Couldn't tell which way the elevator was going if he had two guesses.
320.Couldn't think his way out of a paper bag.
321.Couldn't write dialog for a porno flick.
wco.com
Re: Maybe it's just for fun?
by Jon Christopher (jac8792@tamu.edu) on Sunday June 14, @11:59AM
(User Info)
Sure, having fun is part of the reason why we write code.
The operative question is why we *give it away*.
Peer repute is usually a factor. Consider, would
you want to give away code that demonstrated that
you couldn't hack your way out of a paper bag?
slashdot.org
From: paisley@bilbo.suite.com (Theo Petersen)
Date: Tue, 10 Jan 95 15:17:39 -0600
Subject: Gene Wolve reviews
I like your book review page! Thanks for making it public.
You haven't much to say about Gene Wolfe, but I'm glad you avoided the frequent r.a.sf statement that he couldn't write his way out of a paper bag. Like Donaldson, for most readers he's either a hit or a miss.....
phys.tcu.edu
And etc. & etc. & etc. & etc....
jbe |
