<<<Now, wait a minute. I am the beech tree dryad! And who said she could build a tree-house there?????>>>
Dear C. Strumpet,
I can only assume that you are unaware of certain facts pertaining to the matter of Beech Tree Building Permits. The purpose of this letter is to fill in this regrettable caesura in your knowledge. I take the liberty of characterizing it as 'regrettable' because such ignorance might well have offended one less forgiving than I, and I do regret any risk to your remunerative dryadic position you might, in your ignorance, subject yourself to; for I count you among my favorite lackeys, I mean employees, and would so hate to see you transferred to one of the currently vacant dryad positions, to wit, Turnip Dryad, Ragweed Dryad, Skunk Cabbage Dryad, or Nettle Dryad. Which transfer, dear C.S., it is quite within my authority to make, naturellement.
This situation of which you appear unaware, or to have forgotten, is this:
It just so happens that I am the Supreme Chairperson of the Dryad Selection, Assignment, and Firing Committee. In this capacity, I, shall we say, regulate all dryads; and my special field of expertise is Beech Tree Dryadism -- so you can imagine, C.S., the reverence with which my recommendations are taken by the Committee....
'Nuff said? |
