>>Those that say "yes " with their lips but their actions and heart is saying no all the way.<<
>>you have to have the complete lifestyle of Jesus<<
1) Even, Jesus struggled in the garden, right? He had a real desire to avoid what lay before Him. We can speculate about the reasons, but it doesn't matter much. He had to overcome in His heart and He asked God the Father's help to do what the Father wanted. Was that prayer necessary? I have to think that it was. I find then the principle in Jesus Himself, struggle and a dependence on the Father in order to be able to subjugate His will to the Father, at least in the toughest spots. For us can it be any different? My heart has to sometimes be pulled along, even though I know what is right. Does this happen to you occasionally? As you have said it is easy to say, "Jesus is Lord" with the lips.
2) I want to have the "complete lifestyle" of Jesus as I understand it. That understanding may be less perfect than someone else's, though. Conversely, someone's understanding of that lifestyle may be less acute than mine. As Jesus said the words that we use serve to justify us or condemn us. There is much that can be known about a person's heart by listening to what they say. However, there are some things that are hidden to us and that we cannot discern about the hearts of others. There is recognition of this in scripture. What am I saying? I am saying that if you come to know me you can discern certain things about me, but only God can thoroughly judge my heart. (I'm not saying that you're trying to judge me.) I just think we have to be careful questioning the sincerity of others unless they are blatantly confessing Jesus as Lord and then totally denying Him by theirlifestyle.
In my background people always spoke of "defending the faith." What this had meant in practice for them is putting down everyone who did not hold their very narrow interpretation of the scripture. (I'm not referencing anybody here in the thread on this part of the discussion.) Coming out of that some would say that I've compromised my principles for having any fellowship or agreement with those who do not believe in all the same interpretation of scripture, but I cannot be cavalier at all in saying that someone is not "of the faith." I can look at certain overt behaviors and say more love or a deeper understanding would dictate a different mode of behavior and encourage that person.
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