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To: Karin who wrote (2225)6/7/1999 1:07:00 AM
From: Karin  Respond to of 2733
 
An American woman of 40 wants to get married, but she is only
willing to marry a man if he has never been with a woman. After
several unsuccessful years of searching, she decides to take out a
personal ad. She ends up corresponding with a man who has lived his entire
life in the Australian outback.

They end up getting married. On their wedding night, she goes into the
bathroom to prepare for the festivities. When she returns to the bedroom,
she finds her new husband standing in the middle of the
room, naked... and all the furniture from the room piled in one corner.

"What happened?" she asks.

"I've never been with a woman," he says, "but if it's anything like a
kangaroo, I'm gonna need all the room I can get."



To: Karin who wrote (2225)6/7/1999 1:08:00 AM
From: Karin  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 2733
 
Dress Code

A man, called to testify at the IRS, asked his accountant for advice on what to wear.

"Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let him think you are a pauper."

Then he asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite advice. "Do not let them intimidate you. Wear your most elegant suit and tie."

Confused, the man went to his rabbi, told him of the conflicting advice, and requested some resolution of the dilemma.

"Let me tell you a story," replied the rabbi. "A woman, about to be married, asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. 'Wear a heavy, long, flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck.' But when she asked her best friend, she got conflicting advice. 'Wear your most sexy negligee, with a V neck right down to your navel.'

The man protested: "What does all this have to do with my problem with the IRS?"

"No matter what you wear, you are going to get screwed."