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Strategies & Market Trends : The Thread Formerly Known as No Rest For The Wicked -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Dublin who wrote (51837)	6/23/1999 5:47:00 PM
From: LakesideTrader	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 90042

I picked it because of the ocean and the climate. He wouldn't mind the golf!!!

To: Dublin who wrote (51837)	6/23/1999 5:52:00 PM
From: bobby is sleepless in seattle	Read Replies (3) \| Respond to of 90042

Jeff A...pm'd this to me...thought it might be "on topic"...just make sure the next time you play golf and have a headache, consult a good salesman... Joe was moderately successful golfer, but as he got older he was increasingly hampered by incredible headaches. His golf, personal hygiene and love life started to suffer, he managed to push on, but when his game turned really sour he sought medical help. After being referred from one specialist to another, he finally came across a doctor who solved the problem. "The good news is I can cure your headaches, the bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition which causes your testicles to press up against the base of your spine. The pressure creates one hell of a headache. The only way to relieve the pressure and allow your swing to work again is to remove the testicles." Joe was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he has anything to live for, but then figured at least he could play reasonable golf again. He decided he had no choice but to go under the knife. When he left the hospital, his mind was clear, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself. As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different person. He could make a new beginning, swing free, and live a new life. He went to the club for a drink and as he walked past the Pro shop thought, "That's what I need: a new outfit." He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like some new golf slacks." The salesman eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see . . .size 44 long." Joe laughed, "That's right, how did you know?" "It's my job." Joe tried on the slacks, they fitted perfectly. As Joe admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about a new shirt, I've got some great new Nicklas stock." Joe thought for a moment and then said, "Sure . ." . The salesman eyed Joe and said,"Let's see. . .34 sleeve and . . . 16 and and half neck" Joe was surprised, "That's right, how did you know?" "It's my job." Joe tried on the shirt, and it fitted perfectly. As Joe adjusted the collar in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about new shoes, we just got new stock with soft spikes" Joe was on a roll and agreed. The salesman said, "Let's see. . .9 and a half. . . wide." Joe was astonished, "That's right, how did you know?" "It's my job." Joe tried on the shoes and they fit perfectly. Joe walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about a new hat?" Without hesitating, Joe said, "Sure . . " The salesman eyed Joe's head and said, "Let's see. . .7 5/8." Joe was really impressed, "That's right, how did you know?" "It's my job." >The hat fit perfectly. Joe was feeling great, when the salesman asked, "How about some new underwear, got some great new imported stock." Joe thought for a second and said, "Sure . . "The salesman stepped back, eyed Joe's waist and said, "Let's see. . size 36." Joe laughed, "No, I've worn size 34 since I was 18 years old." The salesman shook his head, "You can't wear a size 34 ; every time you swing it would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache."