To: Skeeter Bug who wrote (64121 ) 7/7/1999 11:50:00 AM From: per strandberg Read Replies (2) | Respond to of 132070
By some strange error in cyberspace, the following fax appeared on my machine this morning. As the companies mentioned below have been discussed on this thread, I thought it might be of general interest. Final report to the CEO of Micron Tech: After a thorough analysis I have come up with the following solution of your financial problems: I suggest a five step solution: 1. To increase the capital base: Close down all R&D activity Close down all production facilities Sell the fabs back to TXN 2. Buy good quality, unbranded DRAMS from SEA 3. Mark them with MU labels 4. Add 30% to the price 5. Sales campaign based on different brand names in different areas: MUlla in Moslem areas, MUus in Canada, MUulah in the US . Special custom packaging as MUcus. Older versions as MUsty. As your qualified economic advisor, I expect to receive the usual royalty of 1% when the proposed activities have been implemented. Respectfully, A. Blochead Final report to the CEO of Gilette: After a thorough analysis I have come up with the following solution of your financial problems: I suggest a four step solution: 1. Develop a 4-blade razor, which by default must be a 33% improvement over the 3-blade type. 2. The handle will be striped in yellow and black. New campaign "Put a Tiger in your hand". 3. TV commercials showing animated razors in a circus ring, jumping through rings of fire. 4. The razors will be launched world-wide, using the brand name "The Fire Ring's Quad" As your qualified economic advisor, I expect to receive the usual royalty of 1% when the proposed activities have been implemented. Respectfully A. Blochead