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Pastimes : Let's Talk About Our Feelings!!! -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: The Philosopher who wrote (45486)	7/13/1999 11:18:00 PM
From: greenspirit	Read Replies (3) \| Respond to of 108807

Christopher, res-I think speech affects people. It can affect them positively or negatively. They can try to control the way they react. But no person can do that perfectly, particularly people who have been subjected to trauma. To claim so is to deny the power we have to hurt or to heal people. I agree speech does effect people. But it's the choice of the person being effected that it happens. They can choose to not be effected at all. Let me see if I can make this clearer... The fact that people don't control the way they react perfectly does not diswade the fact that it is ultimately their choice the way they react. The question really is, do certain words and behavior have a greater propensity to effect people positively or negatively? Of course they do, but the choice, once again, is entirely up to the individual. I can choose to be negatively effected by the gross racism I grew up with, or I can choose to be positively or neutrally effected. But the choice is mine and mine alone. You can also choose to give that power to others. But once again it is your choice. Michael

To: The Philosopher who wrote (45486)	7/13/1999 11:29:00 PM
From: Ilaine	Respond to of 108807

I think words, like ideas, and actions, have consequences. I agree with the Russians, words, like birds, once flown, can never be recovered. And I disagree with the Californians that how one reacts to words is simply a matter of choice. The autonomic nervous system is not under conscious control unless one is a fairly advanced Yogi. But it's a worthy goal. For the rest of us, an attack, even a verbal attack, activates the "flight-or-fight" reaction, which has genuine physiological effects on the nervous system, the immune system, the endocrine system, and so much more. Most of us can only stand a finite amount of stress in one lifetime. But then, I am not from California.

To: The Philosopher who wrote (45486)	7/14/1999 3:50:00 AM
From: nihil	Respond to of 108807

Chris, I think you argue powerfully and well. I once wrote an innocuous (I thought) article in a university alumni magazine. The number of letters from Berkeley graduates was overwhelming -- hundreds and hundreds of letters -- mostly demanding that I be fired or lynched. I finally gave up opening them. To be hated so vigorously was like a slap in the face. I have been cross examined by a lawyer trying to disqualify me as an expert witness --- long lists of things I hadn't written or read were read into the record -- by a snarling, sneering infuriating jerk. I can imagine the mental -- even physical pain of being insulted and humiliated. But I learned something. I started reading Epictetus's Discourses. He teaches that each one of us controls our impressions, and that we can protect ourselves from the worse that can be said or done to us. Also William Glasser, Control Theory , 1985 takes the same approach.