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Pastimes : Another Good Reason Not To Be Married -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Elmer Flugum who wrote (5532)	7/27/1999 2:22:00 PM
From: Neenny	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 6545

Hey Len, don't let me stop you. LOL... your chicken!!

To: Elmer Flugum who wrote (5532)	7/27/1999 11:22:00 PM
From: VBroady	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 6545

No way; brutal honesty - works wonders with women ... they start clucking like hens, thinking they can change you .... THIS IS FOR MEN TIRED OF RECEIVING MALE BASHING JOKES > > How many men does it take to open a beer? > None. It should be opened by the time she brings it. > > Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? > Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will > never be able to support you. > > Why do women have smaller feet than men? > So they can stand closer to the kitchen sink. > > How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? > When she starts her sentence with "A man once told me..." > > How do you fix a woman's watch? > You don't. There is a clock on the oven. > > Why do men pass gas more than women? > Because women won't shut up long enough to build up pressure. > > If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the > front door, who do you let in first? > > The dog of course. At least he'll shut up after you let him in. > > All wives are alike, but they have different faces so you can tell them > apart. > > I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always. > > I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months: I don't like to interrupt > her. > > Scientists have discovered a food to diminish a woman's sex drive by > 90%. > It is Wedding Cake. > > Marriage is a 3 ring circus: > Engagement Ring, Wedding Ring, Suffering. > > Our last fight was my fault: My wife asked me "What's on the TV?" > I said, "Dust!" > > In the beginning, God created the earth and rested. Then God created > Man and rested. Then God created Woman. Since then, > neither God nor Man has rested. > > Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two Mothers-in-law. > > Young Son: "Is it true, Dad, I heard that in some parts of Africa a man > doesn't know his wife until he marries her?" > Dad: That happens in every country, son. > > The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it > once. vb