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Pastimes : Don't Ask Rambi -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Rambi who wrote (33987)	8/4/1999 2:17:00 PM
From: Gauguin	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 71178

Oh, Rambi. I think all of us have been sitting here the last cpl years knowing your boys were getting older, and that this was going to happen, and that it was going to be very hard for you. I'm sure of it. Like flying above a train, watching it worm it's way through the Rockies. (I know.....I don't make these stupid metaphors up, I just write what I see on the ground there.) <<. Dan is quiet and locked in himself, doing his own grieving. We are each in pain, and not doing well sharing it.>> Bluntly, it sounds like you guys better. Find out how to share. (A rare chance to give some advice to Rambi. But the prospects are so unnerving without it being borne together in some way. No?) This is the darn hazard of having kids. I don't have any, I know; but I have stuff like MJ and DDS. So what are ya gonna do? Not have em? (Pretty deep, aint I.) You poor girl. Now you're really getting to be Momma. We'll be here to help. Oh boy! I am guessing wildly, that admitting it's going to be really hard, as opposed to toughing it out good-like, might lead to ways to get thru it. Tell them boys. What it's like. Cry some. A bunch maybe. Then they'll ask you why you're crying, and you can tell them, and slowly slowly you'll feel better. I used to see my Mom cry, and I would ask her why. (Heh heh. Tempting to insert something smarty right here.) It brings things closer together. (Maybe you've already done this.) But you and D need to have a cry. Really. Trust me. (Rrrrrrrright.) Run into the Rockies head on. Find ways to trounce how bad it feels. Or express it. I wouldn't try to be strong. I'd just try to get through to the other side. It's like a wound is coming ~ pretending it won't hurt if you pretend it doesn't hurt is okay, but me I'd scream and see who comes to help me. ~ Your best friend Paul ~ "Keeping the world safe for psychiatry."

To: Rambi who wrote (33987)	8/4/1999 2:25:00 PM
From: Gauguin	Respond to of 71178

Oh ~ My other remedy is for you to adopt me. And MJ. And DDS, of course.

To: Rambi who wrote (33987)	8/4/1999 2:26:00 PM
From: Ilaine	Respond to of 71178

Hi Penni, I haven't left yet, not leaving until Friday. I was just yadda-yadda about having to do stuff before I go. I think you're very brave to send CW off to college, if it were me I'd probably try to get mine to stay home. I think about sending mine off, and it's unbearable. Nick is off with his grandfather, the last I heard they were at Niagara Falls, and I wait for his call every night. My chest feels tight and my breath is a little strained, until he calls. I can't wait until I see him again. I'm already trying to convince them what a great college George Mason is, and how they could live at home and save money, but in my heart I know it's just that I can't bear to send them off any time in the foreseeable future. I remember all the times I drove away from my grandmothers, everyone crying. Why do people have to move away? I wish we still lived in Baton Rouge, even. So, I understand, really, I do. As for Feelings, I agree it's awful. Some of those guys don't have quite enough cheese on their crackers, if you ask me.

To: Rambi who wrote (33987)	8/4/1999 5:26:00 PM
From: Thomas C. White	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 71178

Well, as Paul has been on the money in dispensing some very useful and insightful suggestions, and seems to have covered everything I might have conceivably brought to the fore, I shall simply proclaim myself the plenipotentiary ex officio (without portfolio) of the thread. And on behalf of all, will take the liberty of giving you a long, affectionate, and genuine hug. From me, especially, but I know I hug on behalf of a whole gaggle of us, a few perennial lurkers probably included. Make sure to take a deep breath first...this could take awhile...

To: Rambi who wrote (33987)	8/4/1999 6:50:00 PM
From: Ish	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 71178

<<I am staring at a list of things I HAVE to start doing, like it or not, for CW. We take him to school the weekend of the 21st.>> You should be celebrating. He is going on with the next progression of life. Continuing the cycle. He'll be home again, then gone, then home and soon you'll be beaming at your son, his wife and child who will carry on. CW is ready to move on. That's life, but you will always be his momma. Always and ever. Think of the happy homecomings that will happen. My wife can't have children so my cycle of life ends with me. It ain't as forward looking. Believe me, you have no reason to be sad.