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Pastimes : Happy Hour: A thread for not so intelligent discussions -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Susie924 who wrote (1537)	8/27/1999 1:48:00 AM
From: Barney	Respond to of 2380

Do you know me, Barney????? Only in my dreams.... <VBG> B

To: Susie924 who wrote (1537)	8/27/1999 1:50:00 AM
From: Barney	Respond to of 2380

Subject: How About Some Oxymorons 35. State worker 34. Legally drunk 33. Exact estimate 32. Act naturally 31. Found missing 30. Resident alien 29. Genuine imitation 28. Airline Food 27. Good grief 26. Government organization 25. Sanitary landfill 24. Alone together 23. Small crowd 22. Business ethics 21. Soft rock 20. Butt Head 19. Military Intelligence 18. Sweet sorrow 17. Rural Metro (ambulance service) 16. "Now, then ..." 15. Passive aggression 14. Clearly misunderstood 13. Peace force 12. Extinct Life 11. Plastic glasses 10. Terribly pleased 9. Computer security 8. Political science 7. Tight slacks 6. Definite maybe 5. Pretty ugly 4. Rap music 3. Working vacation 2. Religious tolerance And the number one top Oxymoron.... 1. Microsoft Works

To: Susie924 who wrote (1537)	8/27/1999 1:51:00 AM
From: Barney	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 2380

Just received this today. Down right silly! Subject: OSHA To Whom It May Concern: The Occupational Safety and Health Administration (OSHA) has determined that the maximum safe load capacity on my butt is 2 persons at a time -- unless I install handrails or safety straps. As you have arrived 6th in line to ride my ass today, please take a number and wait your turn. Thank you.

To: Susie924 who wrote (1537)	8/27/1999 8:29:00 AM
From: Zbyte	Respond to of 2380

Psychologists have discovered that the manner in which people eat Oreo cookies provides great insight into their personalities. Choose which method best describes your favorite method of eating Oreo's: 1. The whole thing all at once. 2. One bite at a time. 3. Slow and methodical nibbles examining the results of each bite afterwards. 4. In little feverous nibbles. 5. Dunked in some liquid (milk, coffee...). 6. Twisted apart, the inside, then the cookie. 7. Twisted apart, the inside, and toss the cookie. 8. Just the cookie, not the inside. 9. I just like to lick them, not eat them. 10. I don't have a favorite way because I don't like Oreo. So tell me...How do you eat your OREOS? Put your answers down now, then check below: Your Personality: 1. The whole thing: This means you consume life with abandon, you are fun to be with, exciting, carefree with some hint of recklessness. You are totally irresponsible. No one should trust you with their children. 2. One bite at a time. You are lucky to be one of the 5.4 billion other people who eat their Oreo's this very same way. Just like them, you lack imagination, but that's OK, not to worry, you're normal. 3. Slow and Methodical. You follow the rules. You're very tidy and orderly. You're very meticulous in every detail with every thing you do to the point of being anal retentive and irritating to others. Stay out of the fastlane if you're only going to go the speed limit. 4. Feverous Nibbles. Your boss likes you because you get your work done quickly. You always have a million things to do and never enough time to do them. Mental break downs and suicides run in your family. Valium and Ritalin would do you good. 5. Dunked. Every one likes you because you are always up beat. You like to sugar coat unpleasant experiences and rationalize bad situations into good ones. You are in total denial about the shambles you call a life. You have a propensity towards narcotic addiction. 6. Twisted apart, the inside, and then the cookie. You have a highly curious nature. You take pleasure in breaking things apart to find out how they work, though not always able to put them back together, so you destroy all the evidence of your activities. You deny your involvement when things go wrong. You are a compulsive liar and exhibit deviant, if not criminal, behavior. 7. Twisted apart, the inside, and then toss the cookie. You are good at business and take risk that pay off. You take what you want and throw the rest away. You are greedy, selfish, mean, and lack feelings for others. You should be ashamed of yourself. But that's OK, you don't care, you got yours. 8. Just the cookie, not the inside. You enjoy pain. 9. I just like to lick them, not eat them. Stay away from small furry animals and seek professional medical help -- immediately. 10. I don't have a favorite way, I don't like Oreo cookies. You probably come from a rich family, and like to wear nice things, and go to upscale restaurants. You are particular and fussy about the things you buy, own, and wear. Things have to be just right. You like to be pampered. You are a primadona. There's just no pleasing you. IN OTHER WORDS, WE ARE ALL SICK AND TWISTED IN SOME WAY, ACCORDING TO PSYCHOLOGISTS!