JPR
I think he has taken conversion from brown to white to the max. Here's some interesting info.....
White Trash
what they are and why they suck
Note: This article is not meant to be politically correct. You may be offended. You may disagree. You may laugh. But probably not all of the above. In any case, try to read this as it was meant to be -- a raillery of some of the malcontents of our society, interspersed with a lot of sarcasm. The author is not a racist, satanist, redneck, or a member of 4-H.
White Trash. They're everywhere. Schools. Malls. Movie Theatres. The checkout line at the grocery store. Some call them "wiggers," "hicks," "rednecks," or "skanks." White trash is a growing problem that needs to be addressed.
First of all, what exactly is white trash? Sure, you could take extreme examples from tornado-wreckage scenes and talk shows, but there are subtler variations that can be found in cities, suburbs, and rural parts of the United States. Here is how to spot typical white trash. They may not necessarily be white skinned
Dress
White trash clothing is a large part of what makes someone white trash. Males wear jerseys or T-shirts with logos (Nike, Tommy Hilfiger, and Fila are currently the most popular). Pants are in super-sag mode, usually being jeans or warmup pants. Females will either wear similar clothing or "slut-wear" seemingly in an attempt to look like a prostitute. Males wear jewelry such as gold necklaces and often sport one or more earrings. Females choose the same adornment. Females often wear an abundance of makeup to complete the hooker ensemble. Hats are worn in an off-kilter manner.
Here in Southern California white trash tend to wear the infamous 'wife beater.' A 'wife beater' is the white cotton tanktop (undershirt for normal human beings) that is usually stained with yellow armpit sweat and bought 2 sizes too small to show off the 'man tits' that most white trash males have. If you are unfamiliar with the 'wife beater' i suggest you watch an episode of COPS and while you are viewing a scene that involves a domestic dispute call you will see the drunken male that has just knocked his wife's last tooth out wearing this wonderful garment. If you are really lucky you will get to see the dirty ass crack of the poor fellow as he is loaded into the police car screaming, 'Juanita!!!!!, dont let them take me away!!!!!'"
Face
One outstanding feature of white trash features is the constant dumb expression. This can be the "happy-dumb," the "angry-dumb," or even the "confused-dumb." Males (and some females) support a thin mustache (sometimes referred to as a "trash-stache") which indicates lack of shaving. Hair in males is typically very short and unwashed while females have long hair draped behind them.
"The trash I typically encounter usually sport long, greasy hair. And in addition to the 'trash-stache,' there is the half-grown beard. You see, white trash generally are unable to grow decent looking facial hair, but that doesn't stop them from not shaving. The hair is generally unkempt in nature, not trimmed at all, and thickest around the adam's apple. There is no form or shape to the facial hair, it's longer in some places than in others, and generally hideous to behold.
"In addition, another major facet of white trash is the abundance of hickeys in the neck area. Now, this must be a status symbol for white trash, as most people outgrow this need to show off around the end of the teen years. But no, they love to show them off."
"Perhaps this is a regional, southern Ontario variation, but have you heard of hockey hair? This hideous look features long in the back with short on the top. A sort of neither one thing nor the other mixture." This type of hair cut is known as "the mullet" (thanks LUNAlaVITA).
Behavior
White trash is noisy. Whatever they are saying seems to be necessary for everyone to hear. They are obnoxious and rude, garnering scorn from everyone but fellow trash. Language is often times incomprehensible as it falls into a mixture of hyper-slang and guttural noises. "Twangs" from regional dialects are implemented, often purposely. Work ethic for white trash is typically low. They get poor grades because they don't try, but they don't seem to care. White trash won't go to college and are found in blue collar jobs with little room for advancement.
Preferences
In their spare time (which is abundant), white trash enjoy drinking, smoking, doing illegal drugs, and procreating. Little free time is spent doing anything else but doing the aforementioned or trying to find a means to do them. After doing one or more of these acts, white trash then undertakes acts of violence, destruction of property, or general idiocy.
S.P. adds: "In primarily Hispanic and/or East Indian communities, wiggers can be found too, but there are more "ginos" found there. "Gino" is not a derogatory term aimed against the Italians, it is a term used for persons mainly wearing tear-away Adidas track pants, tight shirts, and with hair more oily than the Exxon Valdez. Ginos perfer to drive white Honda Civics with "low wheels," tinted windows, and expensive streo systems. The music they play is abstract, because they put the bass all the way up, and the treble all the way down, so that the noise that comes out of the speakers is basically what you would sound like if you talked with your open hand firmly pressed against your mouth. You may have heard of the term "gino" but maybe you haven't. Gino Beats are the shit they play in their cars.
Elimination of this Menace
White trash are somewhat akin to cockroaches: For every one that dies there are many more in the nest. Simply all executing white trash is impossible. There are just too many that would slip through the cracks. The root of the problem lies in the frequent replication of white trash.
Take a look at the average pregnant teen. Is she white trash? Is the father white trash? Probably. This leads to white trash children. White trashness is not necessarily hereditary: rather a communicable disease. The longer you hang around white trash, the trashier you become.
How should the problem be addressed? The strength of white trash is also a weakness. To exploit this weakness, I suggest introducing strains of venerial diseases into the white trash population. Venerial diseases are already fairly common in white trash circles. I am thinking a mass-scale infection. Perhaps when doctors are innoculating white trash (or treating them for accidental self-inficted gunshot wounds), they can slip in some syphilis or gonnarhea. It won't take much. The problem here is that white trash don't visit health care providers often enough to make this a feasible solution.
This aside, venerial diseases will halt the spread of white trash, from causing sterility or the advent of more safe sex being practiced. This will slow the spread of the white trash plague.
This plan is still in the conceptual phase. |
