To: Rambi who wrote (63814 ) 11/21/1999 10:49:00 PM From: Ilaine Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 108807
Your comments remind me of something I've never completely resolved in my own mind. As you know, last year I had a very difficult situation develop concerning my practice with another lawyer who was at the time my partner, and it's been very difficult for me to be objective about the situation at all. One thing that I thought was interesting at the time, but was unable to resolve, was a comment by the guy I rented office space from the time, a fellow about the age of my parents, roughly 65, a very attractive older man with a full head of grey hair. He was critical of my erstwhile partner for several reasons, the one I am discussing right now is the fact that he dyes his hair. My older friend pointed out that, in his own case, his grey hairs are "worth money," that people prefer to get advice from someone with grey hair, because they seem to be wiser. My point being, do you think it is true, that at a certain age, grey hair adds gravitas, so that it's counterproductive to attempt to modify one's appearance to look younger than one really is? And if your answer is, yes, would it be the same for women? Speaking only for lawyers, and mindful of the fact that your own husband is a lawyer, and that you have associated with a number of lawyers over the years. I do agree with you that maintaining one's appearance is essential in order to present the appearance of being able to perform, but my own perception is that what matters, at least for men, is being physically fit, e.g., having a slim waistline, being able to engage in physical activities, etc. What it takes to communicate the proper gestalt as an older woman, I have no idea, but look to Sandra Day O'Connor and Ruth Bader Ginsberg as examples. And if you're interested in my own capacity, I don't measure up.