To: Rambi who wrote (42886 ) 11/27/1999 1:15:00 PM From: Jacques Chitte Read Replies (2) | Respond to of 71178
Dear Ma & Pa & all the sundry kin, Im real sorry I couldnt make it to the moutain fer what was bound to be a real good time. I imagine I kin smell Mas fancy eats from all the way down here at Flatland State. Thanksgiving here at the dorm was so different I dont know if I can do it justice. They had this big scrawny bird thing, and the gravy was dry. I mean, realy dry. I tried to light it and it didnt work. They got no sense of tradition here. And they served it with this real soft bread and taters out of a new can, so it wasnt all bad. I took a whole loaf of the bread and peeled the crust off and made a real good baseball out of the rest - just took squeezin it some. They got these checkered walls with these wheels in'em, and when you turn them just right its like a warm thunderstorm. Its realy realy nice. I like soap so much the flatland boys all call me Lather. Sure beats when they called me Polecat at fust, cause they all said I stunk. It helps ifn I shuck my britches before soaping all up. I was gonna tell you about my new lady friend. She is really something - talks all funny though, not like hill folk. She tells me I talk funny. Maybe Xmas I kin bring her a'callin and show her what plain folk talk like. Im sorry if this letters hard to read. Theyre teachin me all kinds a new words here and how to use them. It gets to be a habit. Mama, try to get off yer knees once in a while. Im enclosing some flatland magazines so's you have something real fancy to look at. Pa, try and be nice to Ma. You dont know how good you got it. When I get back, Ill show you some real fancy tricks I leant at Chemical Engineering Class so's yer still won't blow up all the time or go all sour. Your loving son, LR (call me that now)