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Pastimes : Don't Ask Rambi -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Ish who wrote (43611)	12/17/1999 8:37:00 PM
From: Gauguin	Read Replies (4) \| Respond to of 71178

Hi, Ish. Thanks. <<<<Good luck on your medical adventure. And do take a lot of pictures.>>> I was getting a little scared? You know? I think because MJ said, "Don't touch anything in the hospital"? And maybe because I've had about six procedures and only almost died once? You know, I'm pressing my luck? And so we went to the Hospital in Portland and met with the specialist bone surgeon who drilled the holes in the other hip, and who's going to "power-saw this one out" (that's exactly what they do), and we pow-wowed, and I grilled him. Or grueled him. I get mixed up. But either sounds appropriate, as I really tossed him around the room; bandied him about. It was "Bad Cop, Embarrassed Woman, Not-Scared Doctor." (I don't know what "bandied" is.) It was All Over, in just a few minutes. And I felt so good, about the results, that when I got home, I realized we'd been in the car an hour and I never thot about it once. I said, "Can I ask you some questions?" "Okay." "Are we going with cemented or un-cemented." "Un-cemented. Bone grows into metal." "Do you get a kickback on the hardware?" (I've always wanted to ask someone if they get a kickback. I admit, it sounds stupid and petty, but it's like a mini-triumph, to people like me.) "No. They bought me lunch once. This hip lasts the longest for people in your age group, and is more flexible than other types for me to adjust in the surgery to customize it to your muscles and bone's structure." "You're on the Hospital's Board of Directors. With that MBA. Are you unable to focus, or do you need lots of stimulation." "Lots of stimulation. I also noticed I am not as good at business as surgery." "How old are you?" "Sixty seven." [Wow! He looks.....fifty three? Really. Remarkable!] "I ask my colleagues about my motor skills in surgery, and when the time comes, I will assist. I have not retired because you know what I would be doing if I could do whatever I want?" "Yes. I think I guess." {I have to admit, that part is really cool.] Okay. Lemme think a second. He says, handing me his clipboard, "This paper says something could go wrong. Sign it if you agree." I sign it. I don't know what it said. "Okay. I don' know, if, ~ my cousin and wife here are concerned that Paul can't stay in bed for six weeks without bending thru a 60 degree angle. They think you should put me in a full body cast." "You pop it out twice, and I will." "Oh. I want the bones that come out." "That's okay with me, but they won't give them to you." "What do you mean. You're The Man. Board Of Directors. Operating Surgeon. They will do whatever you tell them." "They can't. OSHA won't let them anymore." "I NEED those bones. They're mine." "Call the Hospital and argue with them." "Well...well....I'm going to, and I'm going to say you said give them to me." "Okay. Is that all?" "Will you still be here in fifteen years when I need my replacement?" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ So, now I feel better. Pretty simplistic, huh. But I have a whole nuther week I can start to worry in. I just will need to find something. BTW, a nurse doing IV stuff asked me who was doing the hip, and I told her, and she said, "Gee, I guess that guy is about the best in the country." I think they're sleeping together. But that's what the other bone surgeon who fixed my heel said, too. But I think he signs his check, or they're sleeping together. Besides, how would any of these people know?