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Pastimes : Let's Talk About Our Feelings!!! -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: nihil who wrote (76439)	3/29/2000 8:14:00 AM
From: Rambi	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 108807

Good morning nihil! Actually you have brought up something that I was thinking about yesterday while reading yogi's post: that one man's accepted cultural practice is another's perversion. I decided not to go there as no one seemed eager to discuss- merely slash and burn and like X, I decided this was not a good place to be. In the case of Mormonism, I don't know how prevalent that practice still is, and I don't know how to evaluate it according to the current, and I believe valid, theory about positive paternal involvement, except to say that religion has often provided "excuses" for behavior that isn't normally considered acceptable (human sacrifices, persecution, mutilation). A few years ago in Dallas, a man was arrested for sexual abuse of his small daughter at a basketball game. He was holding her in his lap and stroking her "inappropriately" whatever that meant and someone turned him in. His defense was that in his culture (East Indian Muslim or something- I forget) whatever he was doing was normal father-daughter interaction. I have no idea what the "truth" was or how it turned out, but I hope the judge did some studying and honest reflection before ruling. Your second paragraph is not about the article but about the problem of defining sexual abuse--- which is what gave rise to this whole argument here. With the increase of paternal involvement in childcare, our society is having to examine actions that have in the past not normally been carried out by fathers. Obviously my definition doesn't agree with Lorrie's in general. I know damn well I wasn't sexually abusing my child when I cleaned his genitals. Nor is it a sexual act to bathe with a child. this does NOT mean that it couldn't be, of course. There are always sickos around. Someone PMd me wondering if breastfeeding boys couldn't be considered sexual abuse-- what weird subliminal message are they getting? I personally do think that some of the opposition here to public breastfeeding might rise from some sexual reactions to the idea. Americans have a real problem with sensuality. The poem I posted yesterday came from a site on baby massage. Babies need, thrive on physical love. The more interaction with both parents, in all areas, the more likely a child will in turn become a loving healthy person. For the most part, it is our own sad interpretations of normal loving acts that are the perversions, not the acts themselves.