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Pastimes : FLAME THREAD - Post all obnoxious/derogatory comments here -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: Rainy_Day_Woman who wrote (8408)4/26/2000 3:00:00 PM
From: Nite-Man  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 12754
 
that's not fair! you can't cross reference me to other threads. none of my stories will hold up!

You needn't worry, from what I've been told you'll never be able to live down to your reputation.

NM Pep talk king.



To: Rainy_Day_Woman who wrote (8408)4/30/2000 11:09:00 PM
From: Druss  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 12754
 
The latest sermon from The Church of Christ and the Market Risen.

Good morning brothers and sisters, some of you already know me but for those who don't my name is Reverend Tucker. Now you may be asking why I am speaking to your when your own reverend, Reverend D. Jones is sitting there on a pew in the front of the church. Well, Reverend Jones doesn't even know the answer to that. I have known him for many years and I insisted that I speak to you today. He was kind enough to trust me and allow me to do so.
As many of you know, brothers and sisters, there are now three churches now representing our faith, the faith of the Church of Christ and the Market Risen. Reverend Jones founded our faith and brought me into the fold. Now I am pastor at our church in Aberdeen. That is right brothers and sisters he founded our faith. God spoke to him and brought the Word of God to him! I can not say how much this has meant. Our portfolios alone are up over 400% in the last three years in Aberdeen, I understand the news is equally good here. Even more important is our Church. Our Church stands alone, alone in a terrible sea. We are surrounded by those who are misguided at best and demon spawn Satan worshippers at worst. And there are scant few who are simply misguided. The bulwark of our faith protects us and allows us to share the Lord's bounty.
And That!, is why I wish to speak to you this morning. Reverend Jones who built this Church, this sanctuary from the evils of the world and fine place to get market savvy. He built it with his sweat, his blood, his tireless energy and skill as a trader. He brought us brothers and sisters from the wilderness, from the wilderness to the Land of Milk and Honey. And I say it is time, past time brothers and sisters to do something for Reverend Jones. Reach into your pockets and your purses brothers and sisters, and bring out your money and show your love of this fine man.
Sit down, Reverend Jones, you know I do love you like a brother. I will be heard, I say this will be done. Our debt to you is too great for us not to repay you. Thank you Reverend.
Now brothers and sisters, I do not want you to give until it hurts. I do not want that at all. I want you to give until it is intolerable agony! If bills don't get paid So be it! If children don't get shoes, So be it! If vacations are missed, So be it! This is far too important to do otherwise.
Now I know you are thinking "Reverend Tucker, the market has moved against us, and a few of us even held Microsoft when Reverend Jones called for it to be dumped. So we are hurting now". That may be true. But think brothers and sisters, think! The Lord hears our prayers, but he sees our generousity. Has the Lord not always rewarded the generous? I say to you he will reward you ten fold. Ten Fold! Only if you played Qualcom when it first came to our attention have you gotten a ten bagger. Now those are odds for you. So break out the folding money, your checkbooks or charge cards. Sister Sherry is going to go around collecting and we are set up to handle all major credit cards.
Brother Paul is going to lead us in a few hymns before we conclude todays service. I do have one message before I go. Reverend Dodd of our Springfield church has graciously consented to give the sermon here next week. Reverend Jones has for some reason insisted on speaking to my congregation next week.