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Pastimes : Things That Annoy Me -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: mr.mark who wrote (3608)	4/28/2000 2:38:00 PM
From: Feathered Propeller	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 4023

"goo goo g'joob g'goo goo g'joob" It required a few minutes, but I finally got it... The mind works in mysterious ways...

To: mr.mark who wrote (3608)	5/1/2000 2:11:00 AM
From: Wigglesworth	Respond to of 4023

Incomplete solutions! Robert Wright to San Jose Mercury News: WE who enjoy the gentrification of our downtown neighborhood are sometimes faced with unique challenges to maintain our quality of life and our property values. Consider the shopping cart. When a cart appeared in front of my house, I just pushed it over in front of my neighbor's house. ``Simple problem, simple solution,'' I thought. But the cart kept reappearing. Yesterday I found out why. I caught my neighbor in the act of pushing it back in front of my house. After giving this more thought, I realized that the problem was with me, the fact that I tried to tackle the problem individually, in isolation. We're all in this together, so we need to act together. That's why I modestly propose that whenever we see a shopping cart in front of our own house, we should move it one house to the south. That way, the cart will never come back. Please spread the word. It's plain that we all need to buy into this or it won't work. If you see your neighbor pushing a cart north, remind him gently how we all need to work together. I know that some residents in the Campus Community just to the south might object to receiving carts from my Julian St. James area, but they must understand that we'll be getting all the carts from Northside. We all share the burden. We're in this together. Though this is my idea, I can't take credit for the logic of the solution. It's basic geography. Also, it is not a complete solution. There are carts on east-west streets. And, OK, Gilroy is going to have a serious cart problem. But I'm sure they'll think of something. After all, we did. The complete and universal solution (which will solve the shopping cart problem not only for San Jose but for our complete united states) is to push all them carts towards Texas! From my geography lesson, with all due respect, Texas is the lowest of the low state! (Unless you put the map upside down!) That means my solution takes full advantage of gravity.