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Strategies & Market Trends : Rande Is . . . HOME -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Kevin Shea who wrote (25429)	5/6/2000 10:51:00 AM
From: Rande Is	Read Replies (9) \| Respond to of 57584

OT> > > [JOKINGLY}. . Remember, Kevin. . . there are more and less humane ways of solving your furry little problem. . .<g>. . .for instance, a .22 rifle is far more humane than a shovel or garden hoe. . .or if your problem is bigger. . . . dynamite is more humane than cherry bombs. . . <G> Seriously, I have a cage that traps squirrels, etc. instead of terminating their cute furry little lives. And this way you can drive them to the house someone you don't like. . .and let them go free there. . .<G>. . . ADVERTISEMENT: Get ripped off? Robbed? Duped? Or are you simply feeling a little passive aggressive today? Try Mail-A-Pest. . furry friends shipped anywhere. Send a pair of skunks to the Bill Gates Estate? How about a dozen rats to the office of your broker? Our delivery agents rip open the door to the carriers at the location you specify. We even have night delivery available for nocturnal creatures. . .when you wish to send the gift that 'goes bump in the night'. Or for larger institutions, our Mail-A-Plague division has Locusts, Cicadas and beetles available seasonally. . .for the 'gift that keeps on giving'. Act now and our drivers will spread thousands of Poison Ivy seeds along the flower beds of the address you specify. Or for the finest in invisible passive aggressive gifts, how about that smell that just won't go away. This highly concentrated concoction is specially formulated to withstand all types of cleaning solutions. Sprayed near doorsteps and under automobiles, the scent is heat activated. Available in 4 strengths of "Foul" or our most potent spray called, "That's Disgusting." Additional driver insurance required for all deliveries of this toxic product. The fun way to say, "You stink!" . . [just a joke, folks] Rande Is