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Pastimes : All Clowns Must Be Destroyed -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: patron_anejo_por_favor who wrote (32586)	5/11/2000 5:29:00 PM
From: pater tenebrarum	Respond to of 42523

another great contrary indicator... btw, the one fund group that has been the absolutely poorest performer in the '90's and has the smallest asset base to invest are of course the gold funds, which were all the rage exactly 20 years ago.

To: patron_anejo_por_favor who wrote (32586)	5/11/2000 5:55:00 PM
From: re3	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 42523

Enjoy... Income Taxes A newly deceased man, David, stands at the pearly gates. St. Peter tells him that he cannot go to heaven right away because he cheated on his income taxes. The only way he might get into heaven would be to sleep with a stupid, ugly woman for the next five years and enjoy it. David decides that this is a small price to pay for an eternity in heaven. So off he goes with an ugly stupid woman, while he pretends to be happy. As he walks along, he sees his friend Steve up ahead - with an even uglier woman. When he asks what's going on, Steve replies, "I cheated on my income taxes and scammed the government out of a lot of money." They both shake their heads in understanding and figure that they might as well hang out together to help pass the time. Now David, Steve, and their two ugly women are walking along, minding their own business when they see someone who looks like their old friend Martin up ahead. He is with an absolutely gorgeous woman who looks like a supermodel/centerfold. Stunned, David and Steve approach the man and discover that it is their friend Martin. They ask him how he got this unbelievable goddess, while they're stuck with these god-awful women. Martin replies, "I have no idea, but I'm definitely not complaining. This has been absolutely the best time of my life, and I have had five years of the best sex any man could hope to look forward to. There is only one thing that I can't seem to understand. Every time we finish having sex, she rolls over and murmurs to herself, "Damn income taxes!"?