Aaaahhhh ! Evolution !
How dare us humans devise such a heretical thought! After all at one point earth was the center of the universe/solar system, ah yes and earth was flat ! Both theories completely embraced by the all mighty and kind, [not forgetting inquisition enforced], church!
Now that science has proven that, after all, earth is NOT the center of the universe/solar system, and actually, earth is NOT flat, the church now accepts such proof. [Now that is the most incredible part of this, the church actually AGREES to such new theories!
Ah but evolution ? Naaaaaah, how can we possibly consider such heretical theory ! How can we have the heart to teach such heathen belief to our children !! such .... out of all possible logic concepts !! We humans, come from the monkey ?? Come on !!??
After all, we have the fact that Adam was created by goodie god, and out of a ball of mud !... "puff" just like that, and in a mere 7 days !! including the complete "packaged environment" Neat ! Proof ? Well, we have scripture, what else do we need !!??
We must be believers ! Faith is what gives us strength !! (what else do we have)
Ah yes and we then have good ole god creating Eve, OUT OF A DAMNED RIB !!!! Such an easy thing to believe !! So now I understand how come women are such a pain !! I mean, Adam was asleep when god decided to do this ! If Adam had been awake and asked his opinion, surely he could have said to god:
"Look, why don't you take a small part of my brain, or better yet, why not take another ball out of the same "magical" mud and create my equal as my companion, but NOT MY RIB !!"
And then....
The snake ! the apple... oh yes, the forbidden fruit of paradise, "the fruit of knowledge". Yes, god wanted us to be just a bunch of idiots, er...oops, excuse me, [blind] believers. The church has made sure to attempt to enforce god's will
NOT KNOWLEDGEABLE INDIVIDUALS.
And that's how we ended on spaceship earth ! "Puff!" just like that. Kicked out of paradise because of EVE !! (ah yes, these damned women, they are ALWAYS the cause of all men's problems !)
We, men, (since we are created as the "spitting" image of goodie god), are innocent ! It is women who are the trouble makers if it was not for them we would still be in paradise --full of men !! NO WOMEN !! Oh my !! Kinkyyyyyyyyy !!!
Now I begin to understand how is it that in the particular case of the Catholics.... no women for the priests and "brothers" hmmmm I wonder what dreams of eve's these guys must have !! Ah but I forget, they have god for the love thing !!
Then...
We have the great rains !! to "cleanse" the sins and other sundry evil thoughts !! Surely THAT clears ANY doubt about the certainty of any evolution rubbish. The rains ! yes, and my, oh my, this guy, whot'shisname? Noah ! What a shipping magnate and naval architect, he was able to house a couple of EACH species, imagine the size of the boat ! and the advanced engineering that went on to manage the waste, and the fact that many species were prey for others, ah yes! Imagine the supplies to carry so all of them would be properly fed.... Or... was there some "mana" as well, (no, that was a different story). Hmmm I do not remember that one. NO, I think the naval engineer sounds more believable. --but, but.... What happen to all that engineering, and surely he must have left some testimony that he did not fell off of some edge of the flat earth !!! hmmm how sloppy of an engineer, no records left !! How inconvenient
By the way, a little about the rains: [and the Ark, the Animals, their care, you know, all those inconvenient facts
talkorigins.org
Ah yes... and what we must find in order to "prove" the flood of creationism:
geocities.com
and if you want to see more facts.... and how they are "handled by the raving lunatics...
onthenet.com.au
more... "No answers in Genesis"
onthenet.com.au
So, How can we possibly believe in Evolution, and such theories, when we can believe in more credible things such as:
Immaculate conception !! WHAT ? immaculate? Does that imply that sex is DIRTY ?? (hmmm I love it when you talk dirty !!)
"To assert that the earth revolves around the sun is as erroneous as to claim that Jesus was not born of a virgin."
~ Cardinal Bellarmine, 1615, during the trial of Galileo
HO HO HO HO HO HO....
No, That ain't no Mencken !
Then again...
Tried on "vehement suspicion of heresy," Galileo was forced to swear that he "abjured, cursed and detested" the errors of his work, which extended the findings of the Polish astronomer Nicholaus Copernicus that the Earth Moves.
Legend insists that as he finished his abject, life-saving confession of his errors to the black-cowled Inquisitors, Galileo muttered under his breath: "Nevertheless, it does move."
HA HA HA HA HA....
Of course it does...
Vatican admits Galileo correct
by the Los Angeles Times, October 31, 1992
VATICAN CITY -- It's official: The Earth revolves around the sun, even for the Vatican.
The Roman Catholic Church has admitted erring these past 359 years in formally condemning Galileo Galilei for entertaining scientific truths it long denounced as anti-scriptural heresy.
As a result of the Galileo judgment, the church followed with:
santafe.edu
Still another step was taken: the Inquisitors were ordered, especially in Italy, not to permit the publication of a new edition of any of Galileo's works, or of any similar writings. On the other hand, theologians were urged, now that Copernicus and Galileo and Kepler were silenced, to reply to them with tongue and pen. Europe was flooded with these theological refutations of the Copernican system.
To make all complete, there was prefixed to the Index of the Church, forbidding ``all writings which affirm the motion of the earth,'' a bull signed by the reigning Pope, which, by virtue of his infallibility as a divinely guided teacher in matters of faith and morals, clinched this condemnation into the consciences of the whole Christian world.
From the mass of books which appeared under the auspices of the Church immediately after the condemnation of Galileo, for the purpose of rooting out every vestige of the hated Copernican theory from the mind of the world, two may be taken as typical. The first of these was a work by Scipio Chiaramonti, dedicated to Cardinal Barberini. Among his arguments against the double motion of the earth may be cited the following:
``Animals, which move, have limbs and muscles; the earth has no limbs or muscles, therefore it does not move. It is angels who make Saturn, Jupiter, the sun, etc., turn round. If the earth revolves, it must also have an angel in the centre to set it in motion; but only devils live there; it would therefore be a devil who would impart motion to the earth....
``The planets, the sun, the fixed stars, all belong to one species - namely, that of stars. It seems, therefore, to be a grievous wrong to place the earth, which is a sink of impurity, among these heavenly bodies, which are pure and divine things.''
The next, which I select from the mass of similar works, is the Anticopernicus Catholicus of Polacco. It was intended to deal a finishing stroke at Galileo's heresy. In this it is declared:
``The Scripture always represents the earth as at rest, and the sun and moon as in motion; or, if these latter bodies are ever represented as at rest, Scripture represents this as the result of a great miracle....
``These writings must be prohibited, because they teach certain principles about the position and motion of the terrestrial globe repugnant to Holy Scripture and to the Catholic interpretation of it, not as hypotheses but as established facts....''
Next...
Apology to witches ?
They should... but I doubt it will ever happen.
an entertaining list of "banned books? by the church and others...
bookwire.com
These were (are), the ingenious lot that has "civilized" the "new" world.
An alternative... how about the perfect set of tires ?(and more...)
reasonworks.com
enough for now... |
