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Pastimes : FLAME THREAD - Post all obnoxious/derogatory comments here -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Rainy_Day_Woman who wrote (9593)	8/2/2000 9:08:33 AM
From: Original Mad Dog	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 12754

one more fun than the other though Why, then, do we try so hard to teach our kids that math is fun?

To: Rainy_Day_Woman who wrote (9593)	8/8/2000 8:40:08 AM
From: Solon	Read Replies (1) \| Respond to of 12754

Yes, mathematics and sex are similar <<yes, both calculating one more fun than the other though>> I agree, there is nothing more fun than the search for prime numbers--which brings us to the story... In this city of eternal day, known for its casino action and legal brothels, a new act is taking the locals by storm and is attracting tourists from all over the continent. Most people have heard of putting your foot in your mouth, but one displaced Southern belle is turning an old saw into a sock full of money. Only she isn't putting her own foot in her mouth. For $500.00 a crack, this soft spoken Southern gal will swollow your foot. When I went to visit her operation, just 7 miles from the ski slopes of Lake Tahoe, I was welcomed by Sherry Fox herself--a smiling unassuming gal of perhaps 21 years. The house is tastefully decorated in modern art, and is furnished with several luxurious leather sofas where the girls ply their trade. It is difficult for me to describe the session: After showing me to a seat, Sherry spoke to a yellow haired gal that was settin lookin pretty while she blew smoke rings from a very long cigarette. "Peach. Get the special bottle of bourbon for Solon here. Its not every day we get a real gentleman of his caliber to grace our company with his presence. Take notice, peach, of his expensive finery. He is clearly a man about town. The special bottle mind you". The girl named Peach had a sultry Georgian accent, and she hurried away with a parting smile at me. After most of a bottle of bourbon (on the house), I handed this fascinating lady $500.00 and we removed to the sofa. It is difficult to describe the next several minutes: I was dizzy, and (I confess) perhaps just a little bit drunk. But it certainly felt like she swallowed my foot. Mind you, I was not actually able to see the Act itself, but it really felt good. When it was over I gave her a $50.00 tip, and she poured me some more bourbon while we cooled down. Well, all good things must come to an end. Soon, she escorted me to the door. I must have caught a virus or something. I can usually handle my booze, but I was groggy. But I was still a reporter; I had to know the answer to a burning question: "How do you do it?", I mumbled, "it just doesn't seem possible". She planted a coy kiss on my cheek as I stepped out onto the porch: "Its all mathematics", she cooed seductively; "its a progressive thing. I started young". I suppose this would fit into the category of, for the man who has everything. But, you know, its a funny thing; This exquisite experience simply does not satisfy. It only whets the appetite, and it leaves one wanting more--a lot more. Would this reporter go back? You betcha! Foot swallowing is an incredible experience. The best damn bourbon I ever had.