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To: Susan G who wrote (20959)8/28/2000 3:05:18 AM
From: KLP  Respond to of 28311
 
Agree with you totally Susan! "Real Men Have Manners"...

Hate to say a book or two might be involved, but reading probably wouldn't hurt anything...here's an interesting paper on MANNERS....This is a much longer article, but I've enclosed some highlights below....

city-journal.org

Real Men Have Manners


by Roger Scruton


"Manners makyth man"—the old adage reminds us of an important truth: that people are made, not born, and that they are made by their relation to others.

Manners, properly understood, are the instruments whereby we negotiate our passage through the world, earn the respect and support of others, and form communities, which are something more than the sum of their members

Oscar Wilde wrote that, in matters of the greatest importance, it is style and not sincerity that counts. Not that we should learn to be insincere—but that we should learn something else, so that sincerity is worth it. The something else, which Wilde calls style and I call manners, resides in the minute ability to live and act for others, to stand in their gaze and to influence and be influenced by their judgment. It is a discipline at once of the soul and of the body. And if you do not acquire it at an early age, there is a danger that you will never acquire it at all, or never feel at home with it.