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Politics : Ask Michael Burke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: Knighty Tin who wrote (84613)	10/27/2000 1:45:24 AM
From: ild	Read Replies (4) \| Respond to of 132070

OT:I Love Texas: May 30th: Just moved to Texas. Now this is a state that knows how to live!! Beautiful sunny days and warm balmy evenings. Mountains and deserts blended together. What a place! Watched the sunset from a park lying on a blanket. It was beautiful. I've finally found my home. I love it here. June 14th: Really heating up. Got to 100 today. Not a problem. Live in an air-conditioned home, drive an air-conditioned car. What a pleasure to see the sun every day like this. I'm turning into a real sun worshipper. June 30th: Had the backyard landscaped with western plants today. Lots of cactus and rocks. What a breeze to maintain. No more mowing for me. Another scorcher today, but I love it here. July 10th: The temperature hasn't been below 100 all week. How do people get used to this kind of heat? Too bad it's not a dry heat. Getting used to it is taking longer than I expected. July 15th: Fell asleep by the pool. (Got 3rd degree burns over 60% of my body.) Missed two days of work. What a @#%&$ dumb thing to do. I learned my lesson though: got to respect the ol' sun in a climate like this. July 20th: I missed Tabby (our cat) sneaking into the car when I left this morning. By the time I got out to the hot car for lunch, Tabby had swollen up to the size of a shopping bag and just as I opened the door,she exploded all over $2,000 worth of leather upholstery. I told the kids she ran away. The car now smells like Kibbles and shit. No more pets in this heat! July 25th: Dry #@&$!% heat, my ass. Hot is hot!! The home air conditioner is on the fritz and the &$%@ A/C repairman charged $200 just to drive by and tell me he needed to order parts. July 30th: Been sleeping outside by the pool for three nights now. $1,500 in %$@) house payments and we can't even go inside. Why the holy $%#!) did I ever come here? Aug 4th: 115 degrees. Finally got the air conditioner fixed today. It cost $500 and gets the temperature down to about 90. Stupid repairman peed in my pool. I hate this #@&$!% state. Aug 8th: If another wise jerk cracks, "Hot enough for you today?", I'm going to tear his #@&$!% throat out. Damn heat. By the time I get to work, the radiator is boiling over, my clothes are soaking wet, and I smell like roadkill!! Aug 10th: The weather report might as well be a damn recording: Hot and sunny. It's been too hot two #@& months and the comedian weatherman says it might really warm up next week. Doesn't it ever rain in this barren ^&%#$@ desert?? Water rationing has been in effect all summer, so $1,700 worth of cactus just dried up and blew into the #@&$!% pool.Even a cactus can't live in this ^&%$!& heat. Aug 14th: Welcome to Hell!!! Temperature got to 123 today. Forgot to crack the window and blew the #@&$!% windshield out of the Lincoln. The installer came to fix it and said, "Hot enough for you today?" My wife had to spend the $1,500 house payment to bail me out of jail. Aug 30th: Worst day of the #$@&^ summer. I'm not leaving the house. The #@&$!% monsoon rains finally came and all they did is to make it muggier than Devil's Island. The ^%#@*& Lincoln is now floating somewhere in the Gulf of Mexico with its new $500 windshield. That does it! We're moving back to California where all you have to worry about is earthquakes.