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Politics : Ask Michael Burke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?

To: yard_man who wrote (85306)	11/13/2000 11:33:49 AM
From: Tom M	Read Replies (2) \| Respond to of 132070

> Dear Mr. President: > > I recently saw a bumper sticker that said, "Thank me, I voted for > Clinton-Gore." So, I sat down and reflected on that and I am sending > my "Thank You" for what you have accomplished, specifically: > > 1. Thank you for introducing us to Gennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, > Monica Lewinsky, Dolly Kyle Browning, Kathleen Willey, and, of course > Juanita Broaddrick, who told NBC that you raped her. Are there any > others that we don't know about? > > 2. Thank you for teaching my 8-year-old about oral sex. I had really > planned to wait until he was about 10 or so to discuss it with him, but > now he knows more about it than I did as a senior in college. The cigar > thing was also neat for the kids. > > 3. Thank you for showing us that sexual harassment in the work place > (especially the White house) and on the job is OK, and all you have to > know is what the meaning of "IS" is. It really is great to know that > certain sexual acts are not sex and one person may have sex while the > other one involved does NOT have sex. Monica said frequently while you > were on the phone, she would work at one end, and you at the other. > What productivity!! > > 4. Thank you for reintroducing the concept of impeachment to a new > generation and demonstrating that the ridiculous plot of the movie "Wag > The Dog" could be plausible after all. The people of the Sudan, > Afghanistan and Serbia are all running to rent the video, now that you > made them part of the story. > > 5. Thanks for making Jimmy Carter look competent, Gerald Ford look > graceful, Richard Nixon look honest, Lyndon Johnson look truthful, and > John Kennedy look moral. > > 6. Thank you for the 72 House and Senate witnesses who have pleaded the > 5th Amendment and the 17 witnesses who have fled the country to avoid > testifying about Democrat campaign fund raising. > > 7. Thank you for the 19 charges, 8 convictions, and 4 imprisonment's > from the Whitewater "mess" and the 55 criminal charges and 32 criminal > convictions (so far) in the other "Clinton" scandals. > > 8. Thanks for remembering the families of many deceased people who once > were your friends, who served you and died so young and suddenly: > Vince Foster, Jerry Parks, Ron Brown, Admiral Boorda, Les Aspin, Barbara > Alice Wiese, Mary Mahoney, Jim McDougal et al. > > 9. Thanks also for reducing our military by half, "gutting" much of our > foreign policy, and for providing no real missile defense system for the > American people. Thank you for sharing with our Chinese friends all of > our nuclear weapon designs, the super-computer technology to build such > weapons, the ballistic missile technology so they can have more accurate > missiles, and the encryption technology so they can keep it all secret too. > > 10. You are amazing. Visiting all those countries! Thank you for > flying all over the world on "vacations" carefully disguised as > necessary trips. It's wonderful, too, how you have surpassed every > other president in the size of your entourage on these trips: 75 jumbo > jets, 2000 guests to China alone. Your Africa entourage also was > remarkable and it was nice of you to bring Betty Currie. She needed a > break from testifying before the Grand Jury. Please give my regards to > Hillary, when/if you see her. Tell her I'm working on a "Thank you" > letter for her. > > Looking forward to January 2001, > Average Joe Just emailed to me. Feel free to circulate...