To: cosmicforce who wrote (3342 ) 11/14/2000 12:59:48 PM From: epicure Respond to of 28931 Even as a child this was not obvious to me. God has either been derelict in his duty to show me his obviousness, he does not wish to be obvious, or he doesn't exist. Now, let's take those one at a time. Do I wish to believe in a God that could be accused of being derelict in his duty? One need only look at the world to see that many many people do not find the Christian God very obvious. Far from willfully disbelieving many people don't even know much about him. And my disbelief is not willful- imo. I was born with this computational instrument inside my head called a brain. It has, all my life, added up what I experience and sense, and given me conclusions. I do not willfully command the processes of my synapses in any strict sense of the word. How much choice do I have in what I notice? Why do I hear the song of a bird, and consciously note that, rather than the croaking of a frog, or the sound of the wind? In any environment there are a multitude of signals- why do I tune some in and some out? I don't think we can call that "will". Now this God, whom I have never even sensed the presence of, must know how I am configured. If he has any sense he will know what it takes to make me choose, at whatever level the choice is made. So if God was simply negligent in my design, or in his manifestations to me, I really do not think I want to believe in him. And I do not even know HOW I could believe in something I've seen absolutely no evidence for. I am not made of such material that I can force myself to believe in something I do not see any evidence for. I simply can't do it. God does not wish to be obvious. A coy God, is not really something I want to believe in. A god that plays tricks, that hides fossils, to fool people- not my cup of tea. Again I still have the problem of no evidence, but with this coy God let's add to that mild disgust. God does not exist. I have a great deal of personal evidence for this. Although I do not "believe" it- since I certainly can't prove it, it is my working theory, always ready to be changed should new evidence present itself.