To: Zeev Hed who wrote (213 ) 11/29/2000 7:57:19 AM From: Zakrosian Read Replies (2) | Respond to of 644 Zeev - You're right, but at this point there is no elegant way out. Whoever loses is going to feel cheated, but like you and Carl pointed out, any future counting won't produce conclusive results, so maybe this would be one FOI request that should be denied. There was good evidence that Kennedy won the 1960 election as a result of fraud in both Texas and Illinois; fortunately, at Nixon's request, the issue was dropped and JFK was able to govern as if he had undisputedly won. And on the lighter side, from this morning's Post:washingtonpost.com In accordance with Vice President Gore's call for a return to "Plain English" in public communications, we are excerpting portions of his Monday night speech to the nation, and then translating them into "Plain English." ORIGINAL VERSION: "Good evening. Thank you for taking the time to listen tonight."PLAIN ENGLISH VERSION: "Good evening. Please note that I have six American flags behind me, as opposed to the two my opponent had in his TV appearance."ORIGINAL VERSION: "In many ways, the act of voting and having that vote counted is more important than who wins the majority of the votes that are cast, because whoever wins, the victor will know that the American people have spoken with a voice made mighty by the whole of its integrity."PLAIN ENGLISH VERSION: "Six flags. I am ahead, six to two! I'll just drone on incomprehensibly for a while so you can count 'em for yourself."OFFICIAL VERSION: "A vote is not just a piece of paper. A vote is a human voice, a statement of human principle, and we must not let those voices be silenced."PLAIN ENGLISH VERSION: "A vote is not just a piece of paper. A vote is a human voice, but sometimes it is this faint little kvetchy voice of someone with trifocal lenses as thick as ice cubes and one of those aluminum canes with four rubber toes. This person intended to vote for me and we must not let his voice be silenced just because he got a little confused and accidentally voted for Buchanan or Nader or that little printers union label."OFFICIAL VERSION: "If the people do not in the end choose me, so be it."PLAIN ENGLISH VERSION: " . . . Though, by 'the end' I am referring to a time possibly very much in the future, such as the biblical 'end time' when the seas roil and the lions lie with the lambs and angels dance to the music of a thousand celestial trumpets and the heavens part for the righteous and the wicked are swallowed by hellfire. Until then, we rrrumble."OFFICIAL VERSION: "There are some who would have us bring this election to the fastest conclusion possible. I have a different view."PLAIN ENGLISH VERSION: "See above."OFFICIAL VERSION: "I believe our Constitution matters more than convenience. So, as provided under Florida law, I have decided to contest this inaccurate and incomplete count, in order to ensure the greatest possible credibility for the outcome."PLAIN ENGLISH VERSION: "To those who contend I have no sense of humor, I say this: This whole thing has nothing to do with me or my personal ambition. I am just trying to preserve the integrity of the system. Heck, I don't even want the durned job. Thank you. Thank you very much. You've been a great audience. Tell your friends. I'll be appearing here all week, maybe longer!"ORIGINAL VERSION: "The American people have shown dignity, restraint and respect as the process has moved forward."PLAIN ENGLISH VERSION: "Yes, I know it would appear as though I am building a fortified bunker in the West Wing, with sandbags and concertina wire and machine gun emplacements. I know this might seem unsettling. So thank you for not rioting. Much obliged."ORIGINAL VERSION: "In the end, in one of God's unforeseen paths, this election may point us all to a new common ground, for its very closeness can serve to remind us that we are one people, with a shared history and a shared destiny. Thank you. God bless you, and God bless America."PLAIN ENGLISH VERSION: "Six flags."