SI
SI
discoversearch

We've detected that you're using an ad content blocking browser plug-in or feature. Ads provide a critical source of revenue to the continued operation of Silicon Investor.  We ask that you disable ad blocking while on Silicon Investor in the best interests of our community.  If you are not using an ad blocker but are still receiving this message, make sure your browser's tracking protection is set to the 'standard' level.
Pastimes : G&K Investing for Curmudgeons -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: Mike Buckley who wrote (9705)12/19/2000 10:22:03 AM
From: areokat  Respond to of 22706
 
Breaking News - Santa Claus Subpoenaed

It is rumored Al Gore has subpoenaed Santa Claus over some "irregularities"
found on Christmas list handling procedures.

After the Florida Supreme Court ordered a third election recount, Gore
allegedly said "checking a list, and checking it twice" cannot possibly
discern the true wishes of the children.

And the part about "who has been naughty, and who has been nice" is clearly a
value judgment that does not take into account the circumstance surrounding
said malfeasance.

Santa's list was obtained under the "Freedom of Information Act" and
immediately a DNC boiler room call center was alerted to call all children to
see if items listed on Santa's list were, in fact, the true desired intent of
the kids.

Several indicated they had intended to ask for Sony Playstations, and instead
had checked off Nintendo 64. Many of the children were emotionally
distraught and felt the entire Christmas letter writing experience was
outdated and "hard to understand."

In reviewing the postmarks on Christmas letters, it was found by Democrat
Canvassing officials that certain letters, particularly those requesting "GI
Joe" dolls were not properly postmarked. Those letters (obviously from
Republican children) were thrown out.

Democrat officials have asked that all Palm Beach, Broward, and Dade County
children be contacted in person and have their requests reviewed for accuracy.

Santa Claus indicated there was not possibly enough time to get to each child
by Dec. 25.

The Florida Supreme court is now considering postponement of Christmas until
Dec. 30 to allow for a "full and accurate" list to be compiled.

cak@maybethisexplainswhathappenedtotheSantaClausrally.pov