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To: TechTrader42 who wrote (1270)	3/6/2001 10:50:43 AM
From: TechTrader42	Respond to of 1471

More interesting news from Chronoscopy Tubes today: PRT NEWS SERVICES - March 6, 2001 04:76 WAYWARD, N.Y. -- Chronoscopy Tubes Inc, the leading developer of chronoscopes, announced the appointment of a new "lifelike virtual intelligent CEO," named Chuck Deney. Deney is powered by positronic digital chronoscopic processors, and with the aid of Chronoscopy Tubes' new coordinate transformation interface standard, is capable of zero-instant based chronoscopic "thought." "Essentially, this means that the new virtual CEO has ability to process data at unsurpassed speeds and to extrapolate future data for statistical, scientific and stock market analysis," Jean Baudraut, a company spokesman said. Deney is fully ambulatory and conversational and able to greet visitors to the company, Baudraut said. The new CEO is also equipped with a variety of realistic facial expressions, and has the ability to express emotions -- "sometimes strong emotions," the spokesman added. "He's like any CEO, except that he's capable of accessing infinite amounts of data in an instant, using in-built digital chronoscopic systems." Dr. Fermion Partikals, Senior Vice President of Chronoscopy Tubes, said, "One reason we decided to create a virtual CEO was to preclude costly option packages in the event that Chronoscopy Tubes went public in the future. Now we're not so sure about the reasoning behind that plan, because Deney has already expressed an interest in options." However, Partikals, said, the new CEO has made invaluable contributions to the development of chronoscopy and to the growth of Chronoscopy Tubes. "Some members of the board of directors are very pleased with Chuck Deney," Partikals said. "Employees are understandably concerned about the new CEO's planned layoffs and cutbacks," Partikals added, "but many have welcomed the early retirement package."