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Politics : Ask Michael Burke -- Ignore unavailable to you. Want to Upgrade?


To: Knighty Tin who wrote (90997)5/18/2001 5:45:09 AM
From: bosquedog  Read Replies (1) | Respond to of 132070
 
In case you missed this one:

Message 15818458

"Stock Market Terminology Explained"

Stock Market Dictionary for the past year investor:

Momentum Investing - The fine art of buying high and selling low.

Value Investing - The art of buying low and selling lower.

Broker - Poorer than you were in 1999.

P/E ratio - The percentage of investors wetting their pants as
this market keeps crashing.

Standard & Poor - Your life in a nut shell.

Stock Analyst - Idiot who just downgraded your stock.

Bull Market - A random market movement causing an investor to
mistake himself for a financial genius.

Bear Market - A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no
allowance, the wife gets no jewelry and the husband gets no sex.

Stock split - When your ex-wife and her lawyer split all your
assets equally between themselves.

Financial Planner - A guy who actually remembers his wallet when
he runs to the 7-11 for toilet paper and cigarettes.

Market Correction - The day after you buy stocks.

Cash Flow - The movement your money makes as it disappears down
the toilet.

Call Option - Something people used to do with a telephone in
ancient times before e-mail.

Cisco - Side kick of Poncho.

Yahoo - What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for
$540 per share.

Windows 2000 - What you jump out of when you're the sucker that
bought Yahoo for $540 per share.

Institutional Investor - Past year investor who's now locked up
in a nut house.

Profit - Religious guy who talks to God.

Bill Gates - Where God goes for a loan.

Alan Greenspan - God.



To: Knighty Tin who wrote (90997)4/27/2002 11:30:35 AM
From: Knighty Tin  Read Replies (2) | Respond to of 132070
 
to All, Well, I posted the note I am replying to when ASA hit $21. Now, the poor boy is approaching middle age. <g>