Mr. Watson,
Let's assume I'm stupid. And since I'm a dog, of course I am lazy too. So lazy all I do is lie on a rug in front of a TV set and watch Jerry Springer all day (I used to watch Oprah and a little CNBC, but then I started using that time to search out the nearest tree or fire hydrant).
Being stupid and lazy, I of course couldn't figure out your posts either. So I summoned some first rate lifelines, an English teacher, an honor student, and a doctor. All voted Republican in the past three elections, BTW, so you can't just write them off as dumb liberals. <g>
One at a time, I showed them your sentences:
Of with mr bill the first scum of the earth the non event does come back with of course the genetic footprint of sex lies audio tape all dressed up for monika.
First of all, one of them pointed out, "monika" is spelled with a "c" by Miss Lewinsky, the lady to whom you presumably refer. The English teacher started with a diagramming exercise, which I then also gave to the honor student. "Of with" -- a curious two preposition start. Are we meant to choose between the two as alternative prepositions? "Mr. Bill the first scum of the earth".....well, if you meant "of" then I guess you are talking about Chelsea (or perhaps you meant the progeny of the old Saturday Night Live character of with the high pitched voice). If it's "with", then you meant one or a hundred or more women with a lust for power and a thirst for a good time. Then we proceeded to the next words..... "the non event does come back with of course". Hmmmm. My little doggie brain really struggled with this one. The honor student and the doctor were stumped too. Did this event occur, or did it not occur? What was this event? What is the subject of this sentence? The verb? The object? Even the English teacher couldn't be sure. We went on to the rest of your words of wisdom: "the genetic footprint of sex lies audio tape all dressed up for monika". This sentence, or as the English teacher pointed out, sentence fragment, did approach true genius. Or I think it did. Maybe. Or maybe not. Because I don't have any clue what it meant. Neither did the others.
CONCLUSION AFTER ROUND 1: Dogs, English teachers, honor students, and doctors are stupid and lazy.
ROUND 2
If you don't see how your response to scum implying an admission that you believed that Newt Gingrich was just another they all lie politician I say that you are clueless to understanding what a true visionary is just as you are clueless to the importence of truth.
Trooth is very importent (just make sure not to leave out the "r" next time you misspell it). Newt Gingrich. The guy that signed the contract with America, right? And then delivered on his promise to introduce all elements of that contract into Congress quickly, and then actually got a fair amount of it passed. That guy, right? OK. Now, correct me if I got my history wrong, but was not Mr. Gingrich also the guy who chopped down the cherry tree, and then, so completely mortified at his misconduct, fessed up to the nearest authority figure and was punished??? For he could not tell a lie??? Same guy, right??? A real saintly visionary....
The English teacher and honor student actually argued with me on this one. I insisted that George Washington was the one who left Congress under a cloud of scandal, who served divorce papers on wife #1 while she was in the hospital recuperating from cancer (or was it wife #2, and which one was Martha??? I keep forgetting). They thought it might have been that Newt character, the fat guy with the bad haircuts. The English teacher kept saying that her history teacher friends remembered it differently, but they are probably members of teachers unions so we can't very well listen to them, even if they will be on the front lines of implementing President Bush's education plan. The doctor friend didn't really remember Washington or Gingrich, because that stuff wasn't in a science class anyway, and sentences without verbs don't really bother her.
CONCLUSION AFTER ROUND 2: Dogs, English teachers, honor students, and doctors are really stupid and really lazy, because none of them could figure out what the hell you were trying to say.
ROUND 3
All the scum who jump on the President Bush just show to all what muck they are made of
Where is this President bush? Is it in Washington DC, next to the cherry trees? Did someone jump on it??? Where were the Secret Service, anyway? Oh, maybe you meant it figuratively, like those who would dare to criticize a President are made of muck. I'm really sorry to hear that, because I used to (figuratively) jump all over President Clinton for his shortcomings, and comings in shorts. Is this President not fair game for criticism? Are you and your bizarre use of the English language (is it English? The English teacher thought it might be a Norman dialect of some sort) not fair game for criticism? Are all who fail to understand you stupid and lazy? When a messenger fails to deliver a message so the audience can understand, is the audience always at fault?
Yeah, I guess that must be it. Gee, if I wasn't so stupid and lazy, I could have learned so much today.
CONCLUSION AFTER ROUND 3: Dogs, English teachers, honor students, and doctors are really really stupid and really really lazy. And Thomas A. Watson is a genus.
Do you know what the weather in Chicago is supposed to be tomorrow? TIA |
